tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-89064443079882570422024-03-05T05:05:19.202-05:00{life lover}Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.comBlogger424125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-47464321845995982062017-05-26T11:27:00.000-04:002017-05-26T11:38:40.012-04:00The Truth About The Truth<div style="text-align: center;">
By now many of you have read my blog posts regarding our journey over the last few years. And I'm fairly certain a majority of you have listened to the podcast that I was on a few weeks ago. </div>
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I have received so many encouraging messages from so many of you! Some of you have shared how you are or have gone through difficulties recently and seeing God's hand in our story has encouraged your heart to keep trusting through the dark. Those are the kinds of messages that have blessed my heart! Thank you for sharing those...and I assure you, I have been praying for you! </div>
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Those messages blessed me because <b>that was my hope</b> through this entire journey...<b>that God would use it to show His power through our story.</b></div>
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Those encouraging messages have been balanced out with the harder ones we knew would come. So while encouragement has been an amazingly overwhelming response, there have been other responses too. </div>
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<b>Retreat</b>--friends who listened and have then pulled out of any contact with us </div>
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<b>Questioning</b>--all the "what if" questions..."what if" it would have happened differently. Accusing questions.</div>
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and mostly</div>
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<b>Blaming/Shaming</b>-- somehow making the situation our fault. "How could you?" "You must be angry". "You're just upset because you didn't get your way". </div>
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The thing is, all of these responses were expected. </div>
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What we experienced was abusive behavior. One major characteristic of abuse (sexual, physical, relational) is the victim is blamed. </div>
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<b>"</b><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "roboto" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">many who have been abused find themselves being blamed by others for the hurt they endured, in subtle or overt ways. While it usually begins with the perpetrator, experts say victim-blaming is a cultural phenomenon that can have a debilitating psychological impact on a person already struggling to recover from abuse."</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "roboto" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://health.usnews.com/wellness/articles/2016-04-19/the-psychological-impact-of-victim-blaming-and-how-to-stop-it">source</a></span></span></div>
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This is a huge part of our culture. Its the same attitude that creates and upholds Rape Culture. The victim is blamed for whatever reason seems fitting. We can see this as horrific in sexual assault situations and even domestic violence, but when it comes to relational abuse we seem to overlook it.</div>
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But it is very real.</div>
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So for some of those responses that have cast blame on us, here are some answers for your questions. </div>
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No, I'm not angry. We aren't angry. Did we experience bouts of anger? Absolutely. All you have to do is Google "anger and grief" and you'll find its a normal response to loss. We experienced major loss (of dreams, relationship, the life we knew, etc) so anger was a part of the process. Its an emotion that we have worked through and when it comes creeping up, we take it to the foot of the cross. We ask Jesus what we should do with it. Sometimes it means we take a long drive and cry. Sometimes it means we go over the riverbank and throw a rock (or a few) into the river. We've learned to deal with our anger in healthy ways. So are we angry? Was that our motive? Nope. </div>
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We aren't sharing our story because didn't get what we wanted (basically we weren't sent to church plant as we originally thought). We understand God's sovereignty and He hasn't led us to plant a church right now...but there's still dreams of that some day...maybe. Was our motive a childish one similar to throwing a tantrum because we didn't get what we wanted? Nope. </div>
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Want the real reason we have shared our story? </div>
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<b>Here it is...</b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">truth</span></b></div>
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"Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free"</div>
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John 8:32</div>
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Truth frees. </div>
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Truth brings light to darkness. </div>
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Truth brings healing. </div>
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Truth allows us to see our need for Jesus. </div>
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Truth is a part of God's character. </div>
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The motive for sharing our story is so that others may find freedom, encouragement, healing, and ultimately the heart of Jesus through the truth. </div>
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We aren't defined by the circumstances we have walked through. We are moving forward. Part of moving forward is recognizing the pain, walking through it in a healthy way, taking it to Jesus, fighting lies with truth, and moving forward from it. </div>
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<b><i>We are not defined by it...but our stories have been shaped by it. </i></b></div>
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I am deeply sorry if my words have injured you. </div>
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I am sorry if the words you have read or heard are offensive to you. </div>
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We are not casting any blame on you. </div>
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I am not sorry that I spoke (a tiny peek into) the truth of what we walked through. </div>
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We all walk through difficulties and sometimes they are harder for others to face than they are for us to face ourselves .</div>
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(all the moms out there, say amen?--its hard to watch our kids hurt and sometimes we would rather pretend it isn't there). </div>
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We plan to continue walking this path with Jesus. We can't see what He has in store up ahead, but He's asking us to take each next step with Him. So that's what we are doing. </div>
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Thank you for how you have participated in shaping our story!</div>
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While we would never want to walk this same hard journey again, we are beyond thankful for it!</div>
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Without this piece of the story, we wouldn't know our Jesus the way we know Him now. When we were out on a limb on our own, Jesus was there providing each thing we needed. Holy Spirit has shown up for our family in ways we didn't know possible until this hard season. </div>
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My plea? </div>
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Don't believe the lie that we are angry or vengeful.</div>
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We are thankful! </div>
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We are so amazingly thankful. </div>
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We know we are loved by the Father and there's nothing we need more than that. </div>
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May these words minister grace to your soul. </div>
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"That it may give grace to those who hear" Eph 4:29</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-47048348524676319642017-05-24T16:45:00.001-04:002017-05-24T16:47:16.068-04:00On the Last Day of Kindergarten<div style="text-align: center;">
I'm not even completely sure how we got here. Wasn't it just last week that I was kissing her and sending her off to her <b>first </b>day of school? </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-ccDA3zPZPHjgaugZoMcYZII_hdhInXmpH0DghwH-bdZ1DFBDQvVA99IapgrUZ5zwSk4MyjXa2ULb4eFNDTufL4QCwAgcDeh26cNI8QkeGAWpxKPjpVXl8sRN92P7uZxmkpDwsxKu4iU/s1600/7B11D55F-B9DA-4359-BC2B-754BEBE82A54.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-ccDA3zPZPHjgaugZoMcYZII_hdhInXmpH0DghwH-bdZ1DFBDQvVA99IapgrUZ5zwSk4MyjXa2ULb4eFNDTufL4QCwAgcDeh26cNI8QkeGAWpxKPjpVXl8sRN92P7uZxmkpDwsxKu4iU/s320/7B11D55F-B9DA-4359-BC2B-754BEBE82A54.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Left- first day Right-last day</span></div>
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My Momma-heart is sad because this milestone means she's growing up...and happy because we have made so many amazing memories this year! Of course she learned phonics and how to read. She learned the typical things like addition and subtraction. But I think our family learned so much more than that this year. We learned that God is so much bigger than we ever knew. We learned that He loves our girl and provides for her better than we can fathom.</div>
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God knew what our year would hold when we had no clue. </div>
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God knew exactly what our girl would need this year. </div>
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We were questioned on our decision to send her to public school. We were surrounded by people who homeschool their children and we seriously considered that but never felt at peace about it. While we were nervous to relinquish complete control of our daughter's influences, daily interactions, and education (because, let's be honest, up until this point we controlled basically everything she did, saw and learned) we had to trust that God knew what he was doing. He gave us peace. He told us to send her. He told us to release her into His capable hands. And guys...<b><i><u>He blew us away. </u></i></b></div>
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She wasn't supposed to go to the school she ended up going to. When we went to the board office to fill out transfer paper work they told us "that school didn't accept any kindergarten transfers last year". They said we wouldn't know if she was accepted until the first day of school. And we got her acceptance letter in <b>JUNE.</b> And I read it and cried. We went to visit the school during the summer and her awesome principal said, "what's strange is that Eliyah's transfer is <b>the only one that came through as 'accepted'</b>...every other form says 'pending first day of school'." Those two instances solidified in our minds that God was in this. He was leading. He was providing. </div>
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And as we look back over this year we see His hand all over it. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXfuzWOZWsAu53iLG612fDiXSKAiPJq-OCNVuljx7G0EYiRFOi0XV266otWOXt3PIY-KyHGx9V-HggOyCNA-awbwhWZ0Iyw9ER7GCTWjWSRZyYfMqLRm196EqlWX4q_4cQNgIuqy_KBWE/s1600/IMG_3655.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXfuzWOZWsAu53iLG612fDiXSKAiPJq-OCNVuljx7G0EYiRFOi0XV266otWOXt3PIY-KyHGx9V-HggOyCNA-awbwhWZ0Iyw9ER7GCTWjWSRZyYfMqLRm196EqlWX4q_4cQNgIuqy_KBWE/s200/IMG_3655.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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This lady right here has been absolutely amazing! She was made to teach. Her energy and passion for what she does is contagious and as a trained teacher it blesses my soul...but as a momma it brings me to tears. </div>
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You see, she did more than just teach Eliyah to read. She did more than provide a fun environment to learn. <i>She loved those students and she loved my girl.</i></div>
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Most of you know we had a hard Fall/Winter with deaths of loved ones, a child who spent time in the hospital here as well as multiple appointments at Cincinnati Children's, and there were other draining and difficult things. Looking back there were many days as a momma that I was drained. I was tired physically. I was a wreck emotionally. I was desperate for Jesus. In the moment I didn't see all these things....but in hindsight I see all of that <b>and</b> the fact that God filled in the gaps for me. Those days I was drained and couldn't give my babies everything they needed, God showed up and made up for what I lacked. For Eliyah, He did this through her teacher. </div>
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She loved my girl while she was away from me. She protected her fiercely. She poured her heart into her. And for all of that, I am eternally grateful. God knew Eliyah would need a little extra from someone outside of our family this year. And so He gave her some amazing teachers. </div>
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Today I told her that she was a gift to our family this year. <b>And that's an understatement. </b></div>
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Over the years we have heard a lot of talk about the negatives of the public school system. </div>
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This year we experienced the opposite of everything we've heard. </div>
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We hear about faith being taken out of the public schools, but you know what I saw lived out in real life this year? <b>The gospel</b>. <b><i>"Love your neighbor as yourself"</i>--Its alive and well within the public school. </b></div>
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We went in to this year with a vision to love and serve the people we came in contact with. To love like Jesus. Isn't it funny that when you think you are going to be the one "ministering" to someone else, they end up ministering right back to you? <b>Its the upside-down kingdom of Jesus and our family experienced it this year--interestingly enough <i>not</i> in the church but in the school.</b></div>
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Say what you will about public school...say what you will about our education choices. God is in the schools through the hearts and lives of teachers who choose to show up every day and love their students. </div>
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Today as I watched teachers and students say "see ya next year!" or "good-bye", so many students and teachers had eyes full of tears. These teachers poured their hearts into those students and those are the things that rarely make the news. Those daily moments of commitment and love aren't the things you see on a public platform. But they are things that are changing lives and families. </div>
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<b>Teachers--</b>thank you isn't nearly enough. But thank you for your love and service to our children! You are seen and deeply appreciated! We love you!</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-13007275884597572452017-04-04T08:01:00.001-04:002017-04-04T08:01:59.193-04:00He Parted the Sea<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>"The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent." </b></div>
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<b>Exodus 14:14</b></div>
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This verse has been a constant reminder over the last 18 months that God is the one who fights my battles for me. In the midst of our hard season, He gently and frequently reminded me that my job is not to defend myself, my husband, or my family, but my job is to be still while He fights battles in hearts that only He can fight. </div>
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As anger would grow or fear would rise up in my heart, I would hear Holy Spirit's sweet soft whisper of these words. </div>
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It is calming to know that the God of Heaven is fighting for you.</div>
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It is hard to sit in the difficult moments and not try to fight your own battle. </div>
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<b>The struggle is even harder when it doesn't look like He is fighting for you</b>. </div>
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When untrue words are being thrown around about your character. When those who claim love for you devise and work out plans to clear their name by speaking harsh words about you. When friends choose to believe those untrue words rather than the character of the one they've known for years. </div>
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<i>Not fighting is hard. </i></div>
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But that was the command He gave me continually.</div>
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And let's be honest, my words have no power to change hearts or minds...only He can change hearts and minds.</div>
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Throughout those hard months I never once was lead anywhere beyond Exodus 14:14. If you'd have asked me for the context of the verse I wouldn't have been able to give it to. It was simply the promise that I clung to through it all. And honestly, I believe that was His plan in that moment. </div>
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It wasn't until February when I attended IF:Gathering in Austin that He peeled back another layer for me to see. </div>
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Ellie Holcomb was singing her song "Red Sea Road" and prior to it she gave a small introduction as to how the song came to be. She quoted Exodus 14:14 and my ears perked up...that was my verse. Then she said "Do you know what happens after that?" </div>
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Umm...no. I had no idea. </div>
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Here's context--</div>
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The Israelites are up against the Red Sea with Pharaoh's army closing in on them. They literally have no where to go. They were afraid. That is when Moses reminded them that God was fighting for them. As the Egyptians moved closer, "Moses stretched out his hand over the sea, and the LORD drove the sea back by a strong east wind...and the people of Israel went into the midst of the sea on dry ground" </div>
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As Ellie Holcomb unpacked this scene with her words, my eyes filled with tears. I realized in that moment that I had been like the Israelites--staring an ocean in the face while being pursued by men who were not seeking my good. Where was I to go? Oh, how many times I (we) felt stuck. How many times we begged God for direction, a way out! And only then in a room filled with a couple thousand women worshiping Jesus did I see that <b>God did that for me</b>. </div>
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It wasn't easy...waiting on Him to fight for me. But He made a way out of a spiritually abusive situation by providing another ministry opportunity with leaders who stood by us in the face of accusation. </div>
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Then the lyrics of the song began to flow through the speakers of the auditorium and I felt as though Ellie Holcomb was singing the story of my life. Tears flowed. But not sad tears. Tears of joy and thankfulness that I got to see Holy Spirit prepare a way for me through what seemed like impossible circumstances. He made a road through the ocean for me...and He's still doing that. </div>
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Even from those first words "We've buried dreams", the song spoke to me. </div>
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Because that's what my husband and I have done these last couple years. We've watched our dreams of being sent to church plant die. Yet God's promises of redemption are true...and He has given us new dreams. Different dreams. Dreams that could have only come from Him. And He is giving life to them! </div>
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Ellie Holcomb's other song "Find You Here" has been a deep encouragement through these days as well. I'd encourage you to find it and take a listen.</div>
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<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/n4mCaW9ueu8/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/n4mCaW9ueu8?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">"We've buried dreams</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">laid them deep into the earth behind us.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Said our good-bye's at the grave</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">but everything reminds us.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">God knows we ache, when he asks us to go on</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">How can we go on? </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">We will sing to our souls</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">we won't bury our hope.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Where He leads us to go</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">there's a red sea road. </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">When we can't see the way, </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">He will part the waves</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">And we'll never walk alone </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">down the red sea road.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">How can we trust</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">when you say you will deliver us </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">from all of this pain</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">that threatens to take over us</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">well, this desert's dry</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">but the ocean may consume</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">and we're scared to follow you</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">We will sing to our souls</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">we won't bury our hope</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Where He leads us to go</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">there's a red sea road.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">When we can't see the way</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">He will part the waves</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">and we'll never walk alone </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">down the red sea road." </span></i></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-63084499754777251512017-03-06T15:00:00.006-05:002017-03-06T15:00:40.602-05:00Celebrating 6 <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
This past weekend, we were blessed to be able to celebrate our firstborn turning 6 years old! </div>
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As Michael and I discussed over the course of the weekend, people told us many times when I was pregnant and when she was tiny that it would "fly by". We heard the adage "The days are long but the years are short". We were not not to "blink" because we "would miss it" if we closed our eyes for even a second. We really didn't think we blinked, but I'm pretty sure we must have! </div>
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How can this precious girl be 6 already?!? </div>
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<a href="http://firstpeter310.blogspot.com/2011/03/eliyahs-birth-story.html">This day</a>, the day she was born, feels like it was only a year or two ago. I can still recall almost every detail. I guess that's how it is when you're a mom...taking snapshots in your mind of the details that make life important. </div>
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While my mind can hardly wrap around the fact that this beautiful girl is 6 years old, we spent the entire weekend celebrating her life with friends and family. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtj8N5vgonfZacnXffTM87KCY6ffCHuSzUEB-RGT2T-Gle1nCr1cq_WFh1Q5nKTFm7ZArX7VxNdmiGULpdXj9Vkq0oeT1H7QMXMJk0EUK3N5eOGFIcscV9i38re3DCD-6-Z7ncpmodlNI/s1600/IMG_3040.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtj8N5vgonfZacnXffTM87KCY6ffCHuSzUEB-RGT2T-Gle1nCr1cq_WFh1Q5nKTFm7ZArX7VxNdmiGULpdXj9Vkq0oeT1H7QMXMJk0EUK3N5eOGFIcscV9i38re3DCD-6-Z7ncpmodlNI/s320/IMG_3040.JPG" width="240" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHbUif6QiubehK_wPotckC4pPRVasLEp7uKFku7UeWbFBC-kiMmmiPOJmPllG-ICxXAgDCNfoBZNiRvcoUPZty4AzbJJ5-PhkWZjesNAHjLzR0DgoGaH-Hm4C8jwfmpORsOts2-T019w8/s1600/IMG_3020.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHbUif6QiubehK_wPotckC4pPRVasLEp7uKFku7UeWbFBC-kiMmmiPOJmPllG-ICxXAgDCNfoBZNiRvcoUPZty4AzbJJ5-PhkWZjesNAHjLzR0DgoGaH-Hm4C8jwfmpORsOts2-T019w8/s320/IMG_3020.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn3rnHwBSJLCHzdOEZPxzbiS0UUs-cnyPlSAd6t6bFswyEw2nut9O9NrSnSsHkBZlkqC1gaxF0XG72GIj6x2dxj0OREbcLuPH6DJXdgggzIAwlDsF23vvEHF3y40ym1uI_cljn9CVGpXs/s1600/IMG_3038.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn3rnHwBSJLCHzdOEZPxzbiS0UUs-cnyPlSAd6t6bFswyEw2nut9O9NrSnSsHkBZlkqC1gaxF0XG72GIj6x2dxj0OREbcLuPH6DJXdgggzIAwlDsF23vvEHF3y40ym1uI_cljn9CVGpXs/s320/IMG_3038.JPG" width="240" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhthnJ5J8huA0ivGSLIcReqX1Hs_cpKyRoEk25hyphenhyphenEvC_u18OcuG31r5W6Wk-a6etIJtw-YW7wIz9lDv000HzEBGVEeVPZ7RIbPIA9_Dp3aORhBOvGSWMpDK-8S0Jzy9SNydYDHKmV8CZb0/s1600/IMG_3043.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhthnJ5J8huA0ivGSLIcReqX1Hs_cpKyRoEk25hyphenhyphenEvC_u18OcuG31r5W6Wk-a6etIJtw-YW7wIz9lDv000HzEBGVEeVPZ7RIbPIA9_Dp3aORhBOvGSWMpDK-8S0Jzy9SNydYDHKmV8CZb0/s320/IMG_3043.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx67BYJyXXPb-JSlWAJH6sXNK3gwrbfC5sUVj1K2-_5jCGhudPIk7i-OEk7lK1DaxWVYjjpjQRhv3uyiDhT5cM01A7dSGdfOnXe1UthUMzwDu4UdihvoPOBZoOaxmwldN6dzccUV_Ovig/s1600/IMG_3005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx67BYJyXXPb-JSlWAJH6sXNK3gwrbfC5sUVj1K2-_5jCGhudPIk7i-OEk7lK1DaxWVYjjpjQRhv3uyiDhT5cM01A7dSGdfOnXe1UthUMzwDu4UdihvoPOBZoOaxmwldN6dzccUV_Ovig/s320/IMG_3005.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Happy Birthday Miss Eliyah! </div>
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You are on precious girl! We are so thankful that we have the privilege of parenting you through this life on earth. We thank God for the blessing your life is to our family and many others! </div>
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Momma and Papa love you more deeply than you can comprehend! </div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-90561871334328209352017-03-03T08:40:00.001-05:002017-03-03T08:40:15.337-05:00Beauty in the Tiniest Space<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
I've mentioned a few times here how much I enjoy creating beauty and a welcoming place both in my home and in other arenas. A place where people can feel at ease...where they can "let their hair down" and take their shoes off...where they can feel the peace that Holy Spirit brings. </div>
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That's something I enjoy and seek to bring to my home not just for outsiders who come in (although I love to do that!) , but for my family in particular. We all need a place to land after a hard day or even an easy day! A place where we are comfortable and feel loved. A place where we can taste and see that the Lord is good! God created such a beautiful world and my desire is to create spaces of beauty for my family (and others) to see reflections of God's love in the beauty, love, and peace flowing from our home. </div>
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I recognized recently that while I enjoy creating beautiful spaces, I haven't shared much of our space here on the blog. That's about to change (for more than one reason). Today I'm taking a few moments to show you EvieGrace's nursery. I know some people don't really do a nursery or space for baby, but I feel strongly that each of my children have a space that is theirs even from birth. My older two share a space currently, but they each have their "sacred space" that the other isn't permitted to be in without permission. There's something special about a space of their own. </div>
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Its the smallest room in our house. Absolutely tiny. Some people have walk-in closest bigger than her room. But its one of my favorite spaces in this house. I didn't have a huge budget to work with (my husband lost his job just 3 months before she was born, remember?) but I worked with what I had and used a few Etsy gift cards from her baby shower to add some finishing touches! </div>
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<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpioVnqudrIecz6rACxKyoiwhrNo5kInPzAFbVOlSWHER74owhB8xGpLx5Ijv8t77AyjstSkTzOUDrwSu7TVO4ERg1WdGxEOTrd7ZbQW0r54GjURFUAla76rmXOePhcqEcMnMVeppf5Xs/s1600/IMG_2993.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpioVnqudrIecz6rACxKyoiwhrNo5kInPzAFbVOlSWHER74owhB8xGpLx5Ijv8t77AyjstSkTzOUDrwSu7TVO4ERg1WdGxEOTrd7ZbQW0r54GjURFUAla76rmXOePhcqEcMnMVeppf5Xs/s320/IMG_2993.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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I love that the two windows take up almost all the wall space! They let in SO much light and I absolutely love to see the sun pop through the windows every day!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGtxGOu3Z8vdD80E5HfbhLuvZFCfZb7QdJpsxnSVmsiW2JIjbWcgULcZj0c-aULLOirOCY3G6PkWpdu-jGItXFoceXsef9ULILTm1wADwcSf7B8ObfSlXmC4H4K8SJpJ08pQVKjmv_C6E/s1600/IMG_2996.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGtxGOu3Z8vdD80E5HfbhLuvZFCfZb7QdJpsxnSVmsiW2JIjbWcgULcZj0c-aULLOirOCY3G6PkWpdu-jGItXFoceXsef9ULILTm1wADwcSf7B8ObfSlXmC4H4K8SJpJ08pQVKjmv_C6E/s320/IMG_2996.JPG" width="240" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyltDjyu-9i5sxEg8a8lZBGwM5zQThnT2ukgHqqr2fMCKYNjajS3vU7nPX2SJfldU1o6bcpmItM7BTiJRenVvQJVd6lJZb2HrCOj_RvblSSpz-k9fH7JkYzAf87UE1c4FS14U-4mxmfJY/s1600/IMG_2995.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyltDjyu-9i5sxEg8a8lZBGwM5zQThnT2ukgHqqr2fMCKYNjajS3vU7nPX2SJfldU1o6bcpmItM7BTiJRenVvQJVd6lJZb2HrCOj_RvblSSpz-k9fH7JkYzAf87UE1c4FS14U-4mxmfJY/s320/IMG_2995.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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I decided I really loved the coral/mint/gold color scheme, so that's what we went with. I'm not a huge fan of "matchy-matchy" or even themed rooms. I tend to lean more toward eclectic which is probably good since I usually have to piece-meal things together using what I already have to make it work for a tight budget. </div>
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The crib is the one we have used for all three babies. The little coral table I picked up at Salvation Army thrift store months ago for the master bedroom. I spray painted it coral and then decided it would fit perfectly in this room. It gives us some table space without taking up too much room. </div>
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The lamp was a Target special (around $10) I think. In the evenings as the sun goes down, I love the soft glow of the lamp as opposed to overhead lighting. </div>
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Polka dot decals on the wall add just the right touch! The best part? I already had them! They came in a package I used for our Master bedroom in our previous apartment. I pulled them out of storage and popped them on the wall! </div>
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I made the mobile with an inexpensive embroidery hoop, strips of fabric/ribbon/lace, and hot glue gun. I love it! </div>
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(I even made one for Eliyah's room too).</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3nF6qW4NiBfGTvta9I7_BMkefhCcFExqmjyiL2jir7nOhbbt3i27XmJiG1gHx2o5qaSROImBzqyVF0J1MaeRYn5LMhHiH9aOqx7GBlio34WO9hc_HbZc2p7Uon3RfVNDZUxfrPAhvOhc/s1600/IMG_2994.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3nF6qW4NiBfGTvta9I7_BMkefhCcFExqmjyiL2jir7nOhbbt3i27XmJiG1gHx2o5qaSROImBzqyVF0J1MaeRYn5LMhHiH9aOqx7GBlio34WO9hc_HbZc2p7Uon3RfVNDZUxfrPAhvOhc/s320/IMG_2994.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Since the room is so tiny, we only had space for the changing table (G-ma has the chest of drawers from this set). The basket on the table was one we had laying around that I spray painted white and the shelf above was a wedding gift from years ago that I repurposed for this space. </div>
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On the shelf I put her little gold shoes (because they are adorable), a succulent (artificial) from the Target Dollar Spot, and the canvas that I created using leftover fabric from the mobile and Modge Podge. </div>
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The changing pad cover came from Etsy and its probably one of my favorite pieces in the room along with the canvas print I picked up at Gabriel Brothers for $8! </div>
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You see the rocking chair? </div>
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It used to be ugly. I mean, I loved it! I did...just not the way it looked.</div>
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My mother-in-law gave it to use when Eliyah was born...it had been hers. This time around, I decided to paint it and I just adore how it turned out! The cushions have been waiting to be recovered or replaced entirely for about a year, but that's optional at this point. They aren't my favorite but they work for now! </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMrZRL1aATDVvDZEZEy-U14-J7v7CCn5_Azmw3KJMxHCs-yJ3Q5bFoAHY8KixK20QvPk7XJRbNaDfxtZX1y7y9aMB9ABjzBL-f1HRtLZ8km3e5B9A_ltdMUkenhoj_jcimmtTu9imE9_M/s1600/IMG_2990.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMrZRL1aATDVvDZEZEy-U14-J7v7CCn5_Azmw3KJMxHCs-yJ3Q5bFoAHY8KixK20QvPk7XJRbNaDfxtZX1y7y9aMB9ABjzBL-f1HRtLZ8km3e5B9A_ltdMUkenhoj_jcimmtTu9imE9_M/s320/IMG_2990.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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This tiny space isn't anything fancy or expensive, but it makes me happy. It brings a bit of happiness and welcome to our home. Rocking EvieGrace in that room or just having my coffee in there while I nurse her in the mornings brings joy to me. It isn't perfect, but isn't that the beauty of it? We can enjoy beauty even when it isn't perfect. Like <a href="http://www.thenester.com/">The Nester</a> says, "It doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful." </div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-67651297556396325312017-01-30T14:18:00.001-05:002017-01-30T14:18:32.771-05:00On Addiction...<div style="text-align: center;">
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Addiction isn't simply a physical phenomenon. Its rooted deep in our souls. </div>
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Our souls are designed to crave...we are designed to crave Jesus.</div>
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Yet we seek to fulfill that craving with many other things and in many other ways. </div>
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Anything that provides us with satisfaction (albeit temporary) other than Jesus will become our drug. </div>
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For the physical addict it is obvious. It shows itself in physical manifestations by depleting their physical appearance and affecting their mental capacity. Yet for the soul addict it can be deceptively masqueraded as normal...even applauded.</div>
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Those addicted to physical substances crave that substance to feel satisfied. Those addicted to something deeper in their soul crave that to be okay, secure, and self-approved of. </div>
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So often we say things like "Well, that's what alcohol will do to you" or "Drugs will rob you of your life." And yes. So true. Substances like alcohol and heroin can rob you of your life and bring death at an early age. <b>But soul addictions will rob you of your life even while you live. </b></div>
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Addiction to approval. Addiction to self-promotion. Addiction to self-sufficiency. Addiction to performance. Addiction to applause of men.</div>
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All these will rob you of your life while you still live on this earth. </div>
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I should know. I have experienced it. </div>
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I have lived seeking approval from man and come up empty. I have pushed aside my dreams and pursuit of my gifts because they weren't approved of by others. I'll be the first to tell you, it sucks the life out of you...slowly...so slowly that you almost don't notice it until everything you knew to be true shatters into a thousand pieces and you wake up from the stupor of living a life that isn't the one God created you for. The life you've been living is the one someone else wants to you live (a masquerade) so that it makes them feel good, look good, have the ability to pursue their vision even at the cost of your life. </div>
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We are only free when our hearts are completely filled with Jesus. </div>
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That's the bottom line, ladies and gentlemen. </div>
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Anything that draws our hearts away from the simplicity of the gospel call</div>
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<b>Loving God and loving others</b></div>
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will destroy your life. Will kill you. </div>
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Maybe not physically. </div>
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Maybe not so that anyone can see.</div>
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But it will. </div>
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Our souls were made to crave. </div>
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We were designed to be addicted to Jesus. </div>
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To crave seeing His glory spread.</div>
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To get our high from watching Him at work in the world and standing in awe of His might. </div>
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We (the Christian church) look down on addicts. </div>
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We look at them as their "condition". We define them by their sin. </div>
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We tell them they need Jesus. </div>
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We tell them they need to "get clean" or "stay sober" to be a father, mother, employee... </div>
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The truth is, they are already father, mother, sister, brother, cousin, employee, friend, co-worker...</div>
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And further</div>
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<b>They are no different than us.</b></div>
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It looks different. Oh, it looks very different.</div>
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See we are "responsible." We are holding it together (at least on the outside). We look "normal". We can hold down a job. We can provide for our families. We don't abandon our children. The list of why we are different (and in our eyes, better) goes on and on. </div>
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But take a look at your heart. </div>
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You (I) are no better. </div>
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Without Jesus as the only satisfier of our souls, we die. </div>
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Our addiction is different, but it is present in our hearts. </div>
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My heart breaks over my own condemnation of others when my heart has been <b>in the same condition as their physical body.</b></div>
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Lord, help me to find my satisfaction only in YOU. </div>
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Let me high come from Christ and His untamable love for me.</div>
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Enable me to love other addicts--especially the soul-addicts that think they are alight, because they're the hardest ones to love-- the way you love. </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">My family has stared death in the face twice in the last six week. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Both times the root has been addiction to physical substance. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">These words are simply what God is doing within me as I process these deaths. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">These words welled up within my soul and basically spilled out onto the screen as I typed. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Thank you for taking the time to read my heart and how God is changing and shaping it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Our family appreciates all your prayers and kind thoughts during these difficult days. </span></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-87982627361401405502017-01-24T07:55:00.002-05:002017-01-24T07:55:17.498-05:00Doing the Dishes-- A Book Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
I wouldn't completely consider myself a slob, but with the demands of caring for three littles and a husband my house tends to get the short end of the stick. </div>
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You'd think by now (3 kiddos in and almost 9 years of marriage) I'd have this whole house keeping thing down....cue Real Life. </div>
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I've heard Dana K. White on several different podcasts and read her blog a few times. When her book came out it was on the top of my list for this year. We've been in this house for a little over a year, but getting into a routine of keeping things tidy hasn't come to fruition. Maybe because of all the change we have gone through in the last 18 months...I just couldn't get a handle on things. </div>
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Remember my word for this year? THRIVE? </div>
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Yep...it included house keeping too. </div>
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Because really, don't we all do better when our space is neat? I do.</div>
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So Dana White from A Slob Comes Clean released a book recently and I picked it up with a gift card I got as a Christmas gift.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisNICIdSs6eQ6PnyQ5-sW2G4XAo6zvUkUvWJYNZz3aX9SnEO2aI7W9vZ_udVqNxQhyphenhyphen8GUzJ67WeqCbIfdH_PpUWoBG1rXfarROtreAineLV7pNXdpv9pplkGhS8gH6Qfkh6nyPNlDRyoo/s1600/IMG_2763.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisNICIdSs6eQ6PnyQ5-sW2G4XAo6zvUkUvWJYNZz3aX9SnEO2aI7W9vZ_udVqNxQhyphenhyphen8GUzJ67WeqCbIfdH_PpUWoBG1rXfarROtreAineLV7pNXdpv9pplkGhS8gH6Qfkh6nyPNlDRyoo/s320/IMG_2763.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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This isn't my typical read, but I'm here to tell you that I loved it! </div>
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She shares her struggle with house keeping and how she finally challenged herself (by writing a blog) and overcame much of her angst with house keeping.</div>
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It isn't rocket science or anything earth shattering that she shares, but it works! </div>
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Her basic premise-- Do The Dishes. </div>
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Sounds too good to be true, right? </div>
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Well...the hard part is actually <i>doing</i> the dishes. Making yourself.</div>
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I started putting her habits into practice as I was finishing up the book. My kitchen is tiny and its honestly my least favorite space in our house because it's tiny counters are typically full of dishes and the like. It always seems cluttered, unkept, and generally difficult to work in. When it comes time to make dinner I struggle to work effectively because things are dirty or not where they are supposed to be. I get easily frustrated. </div>
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When I started doing my dishes every day and sweeping the floor (the first two habits she suggests) things changed. Now, I actually had to do the work, but it became easier each day...just like she said it would. </div>
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Girls, there was one day that I walked by the kitchen and actually did a double-take because it was clean....in the middle of the day. </div>
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I'm not claiming to have this thing licked (you should see the kitchen after last week's travel and the busyness of this last weekend) but it really is helping me and transforming our home...slowly...but transformation takes time.</div>
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If you're looking for a <strike>little</strike> lot of help with your home, pick up a copy of this book. </div>
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Dana's down-to-earth advice and humor (combined with short, easy-to-read chapters) will have you inspired and encouraged that you <i>can</i> keep a tidy home! </div>
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*Update--I have actually finished 2 books so far this year! My reading goal for 2017 is moving right along! Look out for another book review coming soon!*</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-44557708536735329192017-01-20T09:10:00.000-05:002017-01-20T09:13:34.259-05:00Year to Thrive<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'd still consider myself a "rookie" when it comes to choosing a word for the year. </div>
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Myriads of others have done it for many years, but this is only my second year. I recently wrote a <a href="http://firstpeter310.blogspot.com/2016/12/year-of-rest.html">post</a> on my <a href="http://firstpeter310.blogspot.com/2016/12/year-of-rest.html">Year of Rest</a>.</div>
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As we approached the end of 2016, I really had no idea what word God was leading me to for the coming year. Yet while reading <i>The Magnolia Story</i> by Chip and Joanna Gaines I became increasingly inspired. The risks they took to pursue their dreams. The ways God had to show up for them because they stepped out in faith to pursue those dreams. The way some of their dreams had to die for a season and then God resurrected them later in life. It was inspiring to me. Then I came across the chapter where Joanna spends several pages discussing a season in which she felt as though she was simply surviving life and what it looked like for her to thrive. </div>
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She was speaking my language. </div>
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Through the ups and downs of the last few years (along with the challenges that come with three littles), I have often felt as though I were hanging on for the ride, letting life live me rather than living life. </div>
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It felt a bit ridiculous to choose the word Thrive because I read it in someone else's book. </div>
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It felt like cheating. </div>
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But Holy Spirit kept bringing me back to that word and that desire deep in my soul to truly thrive this year. </div>
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"THRIVE"</div>
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to prosper; flourish; bloom</div>
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That's the one little word that is helping direct 2017 for me. </div>
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And for the first time in a few years, I feel that I have the freedom to truly flourish in the ways God is directing me unhindered by man's opinions. There's freedom to bloom in my areas of giftedness rather than feeling as if my gifts are "less-than" because they aren't as outwardly useful to others. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_-DG1V9GM7gvujUuf_Nv8uawjJXs1mgxVs7cqr-y4G3_Ha-ZCeiRt3gjZDy97KYEhKhqVfqqz-wT_mSx1eQvWb93FxvGGGz3AMP8dmuP8OICd2DRpisWGtP2t7-lRPr4UDHUiXp5J4L8/s1600/IMG_2663.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_-DG1V9GM7gvujUuf_Nv8uawjJXs1mgxVs7cqr-y4G3_Ha-ZCeiRt3gjZDy97KYEhKhqVfqqz-wT_mSx1eQvWb93FxvGGGz3AMP8dmuP8OICd2DRpisWGtP2t7-lRPr4UDHUiXp5J4L8/s200/IMG_2663.JPG" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzbUPyGaKAxlbZuaLoDGxByjgjY5dQIlrCPXjwsm5P4b5yXyZ64up277D7DjfC6g4bvMXVikN8KDElcTlJJuYJNvo00xlQRRjpDPboH9IBkHPFL74htQORcr72X7mODO7j6MtAbn21H_0/s1600/IMG_2466.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzbUPyGaKAxlbZuaLoDGxByjgjY5dQIlrCPXjwsm5P4b5yXyZ64up277D7DjfC6g4bvMXVikN8KDElcTlJJuYJNvo00xlQRRjpDPboH9IBkHPFL74htQORcr72X7mODO7j6MtAbn21H_0/s200/IMG_2466.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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Now my questions have become, "What does 'Thrive' look like for me?"</div>
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Holy Spirit keeps graciously whispering answers to that question in my mind. He keeps guiding me. </div>
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I believe the first thing I'm called to on this journey to thrive is to attend IF:Gathering 2017 in Austin, TX. Girls, that feels daunting! Leaving babies, flying across the country alone, staying with people I only know through social media...</div>
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Totally NOT typical Rachel. </div>
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But since when does God do "typical"? </div>
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He's calling me to step into the unknown and follow...and so I must. Anything else would be disobedience and that's simply not a place I'm willing to live. </div>
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Risk is scary. It requires faith. Isn't that what the gospel is all about? </div>
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Its risky. It requires faith. It goes against every logical bone in our being.</div>
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But its good. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSEemyFaoqRcIeKEwiacoz4HPgqcz3MWscqv6zYsuz5UiI-LuH1ngBbhrU1QkO-ODA4nPaMPrpb-aJSBaHahTQ7z63UWoUPBYyWcictg7rdf5xWzawMuqtDI66clcmwEDgl8iGC6Bn1pY/s1600/IMG_2598.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSEemyFaoqRcIeKEwiacoz4HPgqcz3MWscqv6zYsuz5UiI-LuH1ngBbhrU1QkO-ODA4nPaMPrpb-aJSBaHahTQ7z63UWoUPBYyWcictg7rdf5xWzawMuqtDI66clcmwEDgl8iGC6Bn1pY/s200/IMG_2598.JPG" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmcDI12SOcgZs88Dkm7Hv2_9uyRMXv2nSsgCAAf-4H7BwUE-Jwgs1NOMKykxoc3mmpmAwWMUcsWQaFkKArmY57FyW3fJto4BCWyVQIvAbj3Vl9Oaed4FyXp5SxKgV_OmjDk95cwTaqZZI/s1600/IMG_2477.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmcDI12SOcgZs88Dkm7Hv2_9uyRMXv2nSsgCAAf-4H7BwUE-Jwgs1NOMKykxoc3mmpmAwWMUcsWQaFkKArmY57FyW3fJto4BCWyVQIvAbj3Vl9Oaed4FyXp5SxKgV_OmjDk95cwTaqZZI/s200/IMG_2477.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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Other things Holy Spirit keeps whispering is that "thriving" looks simple. mundane. ordinary. </div>
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Like investing in time with my family. Cooking meals. Running errands. </div>
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Just doing those things with intention and focus and (are you ready for it?) JOY! </div>
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He's impressed upon my heart a few categories or areas of my life where I can easily put a spirit of thriving into practice: </div>
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<b>family</b></div>
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<i>those things I always want to do with my family...my kids...but never do because of time? yeah. do those. make time. Focus on joy in parenting even in the hard. Spend special time with Michael to invest more deeply in our marriage. </i></div>
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Its simple things--like feeding kids early, putting them to bed and eating our dinner late...alone...and actually talking! </div>
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Putting phones away, not even charging them in the bedroom, being less distracted.</div>
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Reading more to the kids. Playing outside more. </div>
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<b>cooking</b></div>
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<i>recently my menu plan has gotten so "blah!". I like to rotate meals and make easy things that everyone enjoys, but I'm ready for some pep! Adding some new things and being a bit more adventurous. </i></div>
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So I checked out some cookbooks from the library and despite having food limitations, I'm going to adapt some recipes from Pioneer Woman (and others). </div>
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We picked up some maize flour at Jungle Jim's recently...so I can make my kids a Ugandan meal. </div>
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Taco Tuesdays anyone? We've talked for a while about implementing a simple monthly taco night where the door is open for anyone to join. With littles and our schedule its hard but we want to make it work. </div>
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<b>reading</b></div>
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<i>books. piles and stacks and heaps of them! We love books and enjoy reading yet so often I get halfway through and find something else to read. </i></div>
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Three specific things this year</div>
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finish books I've started</div>
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read at least 10 books I already own but never read</div>
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read more fiction</div>
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<b>spiritual growth</b></div>
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<i>in all my years as a believer, I've never made it through the Bible in a year (check the above section on reading...). I found a plan this year that is only 5 days per week which gives room to miss a day or two and not be completely defeated.</i></div>
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So that's the plan. Read through the Bible with this reading plan. I've done okay so far! We'll check in later in the year!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0TMjZ34mzxNpKAR-Yc_Eml2hd-hijuq0HbJCDdZwBwW9nzX-vBni5B16ztw3UxEVOJOXN_2XX03HLRVVpZjMu_6t6bvwueihvqXn51Wki46buFCGR7PEIjNdgt6JZs9GZRb7QWQ-rKEI/s1600/IMG_2406.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0TMjZ34mzxNpKAR-Yc_Eml2hd-hijuq0HbJCDdZwBwW9nzX-vBni5B16ztw3UxEVOJOXN_2XX03HLRVVpZjMu_6t6bvwueihvqXn51Wki46buFCGR7PEIjNdgt6JZs9GZRb7QWQ-rKEI/s200/IMG_2406.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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I'll be honest, so much is not nailed down for us this year. We see many changes on the horizon. Changes that in years past would have scared us. Things we would have said "definitely not" to feel like a peaceful "yes" now. We are even excited about things we said we would "never" do! Isn't God funny? He gives us our desires and changes them as He sees fit (Proverbs 21:1) for His purposes in our lives and for our Joy.</div>
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May you bloom into the person God has created YOU to be this year! </div>
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<a href="http://s1184.photobucket.com/albums/z331/mrservin1/?action=view&current=signature.png" target="_blank"><img alt="Photobucket" border="0" src="http://i1184.photobucket.com/albums/z331/mrservin1/signature.png" /></a>
<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-43045239897581430912017-01-01T11:26:00.000-05:002017-01-01T11:26:10.050-05:00Taking Back Ground<div style="text-align: center;">
4 minutes. </div>
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Sold Out. </div>
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In under 4 minutes. </div>
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IF:Austin 2016.</div>
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And I got a ticket!</div>
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I was blown away! </div>
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IF:Gathering has been such an integral piece of my story over the last four years and I while I had hosted IF:Local for three years, I wanted to attend the live gathering in Austin, TX. God granted me a ticket! I was stoked! I wasn't sure how I'd make it work, but I was so thankful to have at least gotten a ticket. That's the hardest part! </div>
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So I started praying for the way to be prepared for me. </div>
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A flight from Charleston to Austin isn't cheap...neither are hotel rooms for 3 nights. It wasn't looking very hopeful!</div>
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Cue February when my husband's 18-month position at our church came to an end, he still (after 6 months of looking) didn't have a full time position, the church decided they didn't want to extend his position at all, 70 % of our income was cut out of our budget over-night, and we were asked to live off of our (meager) savings...with two small children and a third on the way...</div>
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I determined there was no way I could go. </div>
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I contacted IF:Gathering administration and asked that they give my ticket to the next person on the waiting list. </div>
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I knew it was what I had to do. What was best for my family. </div>
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But it was hard! That once-in-a-lifetime opportunity was snatched from me. I believe that Satan did everything he could to keep me from going. And he succeeded. </div>
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But God...</div>
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I once again hosted an IF:Local (pretty spur-of-the-moment) and more than 40 women from several different churches from around the area attended. God blessed that gathering of women immensely! </div>
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September of 2016 when tickets to IF:Austin 2017 were to go on sale, I decided to try again for a ticket. </div>
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2 minutes. </div>
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This year they sold out in 2 minutes.</div>
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And AGAIN I got a ticket!</div>
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So that once-in-a-lifetime thing that the Enemy tried to steal?</div>
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God gave it back. </div>
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He is restoring what the enemy attempted to destroy. </div>
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He has stolen much from our family in the last year, but we are taking back that ground in the coming days, months, years. </div>
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We aren't exactly sure what that looks like, but it definitely encompasses taking full advantage of this opportunity in front of me.</div>
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Hubs and I are convinced that we aren't letting anything keep me from going. </div>
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Yesterday I purchased my airline ticket! </div>
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I'm working on plans for a place to stay. </div>
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It is happening. </div>
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I'm beyond thrilled and thankful! </div>
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I have no idea what God wants to do in my heart while I am there, but its obvious that He wants me there. I have no doubt there will be obstacles (like leaving my 9-month old super-clingy-to-momma baby...) but I know I am to push through. I know I am supposed to be there. </div>
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So, will you pray with me? Will you pray for my family while I am away next month? Will you pray for flights to go as planned and obstacles to be minimal? </div>
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This will be a spiritual battle in the heavenlies and the only way to fight it will be with the spiritual weapon of prayer that we have been given. </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">If you'd like to help me get there, I am putting all proceeds from my <a href="http://www.etsy.com/shop/racheleervin">Etsy shop</a> this month toward the cost of the trip. </span></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-41661733554218772362016-12-28T08:53:00.001-05:002016-12-28T08:53:08.254-05:00Year of "Rest" <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQtAwBo-v-TaDegLTpEbCn3HDHqhrT0GQcoW7bIyKpaNTfdGiGQ9jFFMiYQYSuk1wQBMLHdg9aDb489TCZyI2TqJ-xuaVlnec72wQiNn6TAkcQOmty767blvVNwmxGteswusNHZa2_kxI/s1600/blogger-image-1170994599.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQtAwBo-v-TaDegLTpEbCn3HDHqhrT0GQcoW7bIyKpaNTfdGiGQ9jFFMiYQYSuk1wQBMLHdg9aDb489TCZyI2TqJ-xuaVlnec72wQiNn6TAkcQOmty767blvVNwmxGteswusNHZa2_kxI/s320/blogger-image-1170994599.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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2016 was the first time I chose one word for the year. </div>
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It wasn't even that I had planned to but that Holy Spirit continued to impress upon my heart the word "rest", so I decided that was something to pay attention to and focus on. </div>
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Initially I focused on physical rest.</div>
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Clearing my calendar. </div>
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Learning to say "no" to things that weren't essential. </div>
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Doing less. </div>
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That was hard. I'm a person who enjoys being productive. I enjoy being involved with community and yet I was feeling called to give up so much of that. Pouring into my own family (mainly my children) more than others became a primary focus. But still slowing down is hard. </div>
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Then things began to shift. I've mentioned before that we have faced a very difficult year and in February when things started to unravel the focus of this "rest" shifted from only physical to deeply spiritual. God was asking me to rest in Him. To simply "be" and allow Him to fight my battles. Allow Him to provide for me. Allow Him to protect me. Allow His plan to unfold rather than plowing through with what I thought the plan was. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVOKHA-ax_h1SlktXK0O7LzL4aG4XRzqghhkxldEcElmmlQ6xKWIRbvT8Ao-Nf1-B5geIJQIWQ7t-LFdMSWcyzrR8-towIy2_w_adyLd1zLpBzrkkB2_x3dNPlEiajQdR110J7pOptjY4/s1600/IMG_2642.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVOKHA-ax_h1SlktXK0O7LzL4aG4XRzqghhkxldEcElmmlQ6xKWIRbvT8Ao-Nf1-B5geIJQIWQ7t-LFdMSWcyzrR8-towIy2_w_adyLd1zLpBzrkkB2_x3dNPlEiajQdR110J7pOptjY4/s320/IMG_2642.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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I snapped this picture a couple of days ago. </div>
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My tiny girl completely at rest in the arms of her Papa. </div>
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It completely captures the way God wanted me to rest in Him. Though I did not always have full trust like a sleeping babe in the arms of her Papa, I did learn to be more still and to wait on Him. </div>
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And He proved faithful...time and time again. </div>
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This Christmas wasn't what we expected. </div>
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Our son was hospitalized for several days during the month of December and we still don't fully have a diagnosis as to what exactly was and is wrong. But that's another opportunity to rest in God's goodness. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQilUIYpYiyXlzBoUfNnnuSqn0ehg_LIW4OUIqQmhjVRCKLw5uuEI7C_Ox8E2J4Zn-9d5sSebJMXwrHz5BlAqFk1FMzQnXg2mIshVNp4Nx6oIiPG6g4xks0r82Bb3EgVwfiZof16V6gl0/s1600/IMG_2579.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQilUIYpYiyXlzBoUfNnnuSqn0ehg_LIW4OUIqQmhjVRCKLw5uuEI7C_Ox8E2J4Zn-9d5sSebJMXwrHz5BlAqFk1FMzQnXg2mIshVNp4Nx6oIiPG6g4xks0r82Bb3EgVwfiZof16V6gl0/s320/IMG_2579.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Just six days before Christmas my mother-in-law passed away unexpectedly. </div>
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Two weeks in a row was were hit with very hard things. </div>
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It definitely made for a difficult Advent and Christmas season. </div>
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But again, it was an opportunity to rest. </div>
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Despite all the hardships we have walked through this year, our family feels hopeful. </div>
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God is proving faithful over and over. He is answering prayers. He is leading us. </div>
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He is even allowing us to dream again.</div>
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Dream of the things He might have for us in the coming years. </div>
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Just talking through a lot of hard things this week my husband referenced my word "rest". He said, "Don't you feel like its morphed so much this year? And now looking back at the end, we can see how so many of the things that held us captive, held us back from really running hard after God, have all been LAID TO REST."</div>
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Wow! Yes!</div>
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Until that moment I hadn't seen it, but that is true! </div>
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So many of the things that kept us comfortable and kept us from fully pursuing dreams and callings (even good things like a community of people we love) have been laid to rest. They have been removed from our lives. And yes, we grieved. Oh! How we grieved the lose of so many things this calendar year! Death of relationships. Death of the vision we thought we were pursuing. Death (physical death) of loved ones (we lost my mother-in-law and also our family dog that had been with us for 8 years). </div>
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So hard. So many tears.</div>
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While we still grieve some of those losses, there is hope in the grief. </div>
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We are free from some of those things that were holding us in captivity. They've been laid to "rest". </div>
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The work God has done in our hearts this year was excruciatingly painful. </div>
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But now...NOW...looking back and looking forward--</div>
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all we see is redemption. Hope. Vision. Excitement. </div>
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With the turning of the calendar we sense a turning of the tide. </div>
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We are excited for what God has for our family this year.</div>
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We've spent hours over the last few weeks dreaming of what it will look like. Who knows...maybe we really have no clue what God intends for us this year, but its fun to dream! After several years of not having the freedom to dream our own dreams, we are reveling in the joy of dreaming God's dreams for us. Living loved. Following HIM. </div>
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Thank you Jesus for 2016. </div>
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For the hard ships and the glimmers of joy. </div>
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For being a year that was painful...</div>
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for birthing so much out of that pain.</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-853609036758688672016-12-13T06:00:00.000-05:002016-12-13T06:00:20.310-05:00She Believed She Couldn't... <div style="text-align: center;">
I'm sure you've seen this quote floating around Pinterest...</div>
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or heard someone say it...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmaUPsHFtW0rOIAsbFfVuyH53Vr6b2_uDgGvvFULwRQQQJ2VUe4kAkYIcFG1ygZVGwn0J3oOnPUN6t1HE_gc1Pc-h_0S3L88Mgw3vGaR1TcFebgl7QfCny_UYX8tK98Wok1eJcVZPZXLA/s1600/brett-wilson-she-believed-she-could-so-she-did.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmaUPsHFtW0rOIAsbFfVuyH53Vr6b2_uDgGvvFULwRQQQJ2VUe4kAkYIcFG1ygZVGwn0J3oOnPUN6t1HE_gc1Pc-h_0S3L88Mgw3vGaR1TcFebgl7QfCny_UYX8tK98Wok1eJcVZPZXLA/s320/brett-wilson-she-believed-she-could-so-she-did.jpg" width="239" /></a></div>
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It's kind of inspiring, right? </div>
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Don't get me wrong, I love the strength that God gives women and we seem to live in a culture (even within the church) that lives this belief out. Its a "boot straps" mentality. </div>
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I recently heard someone challenge this quote with another...a better...a more accurate one. </div>
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"<i>She believed she couldn't, so God did!"</i></div>
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Several months ago during a time when my husband and I were being questioned regarding our call to pastor and plant a church, I was asked, "So do you think you're ready to be a pastor's wife?" This question with it's tone came as a shock to me. A fellow Christ-follower was the one asking...and asking with a hint of "I don't think you're ready" inflection. What shocked me wasn't the question it self or the tone with which it was asked. What shocked me the belief system behind that question. The belief that I could actually "be ready" for something that huge. </div>
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If I had answered yes, I would have proved that I indeed was not ready. I would simply have proved arrogance. </div>
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How arrogant would it be for me to say, "I'm absolutely ready! I've got this under control" because that's basically saying, "I don't need God for any of this...it's all me. I got it"</div>
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My answer</div>
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"No. I'm not ready. And I'll never be ready. That's why I need Jesus! It isn't faith if I don't need Jesus...if I can do it all myself." </div>
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Do I believe I'm ready for the challenges ahead? </div>
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Do I think I've got it under control? </div>
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Absolutely not. </div>
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But that's the beauty of the kingdom of God. </div>
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We can't. He can. </div>
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His power is made perfect in our weakness. </div>
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It's His work...not mine. I'm only called to obey His call and He will fulfill the rest. </div>
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I've thought many times about answering that same question again.</div>
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If I'm ever asked again, I'll say the same thing and maybe add a little. </div>
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"If you're asking me if I'm ready to plaster a smile on my face each Sunday, make sure my children's hair is perfectly combed and they behave in an acceptable manner, respond 'I'm fine' when asked how I'm doing, live in fear of what other's expect or think of me as a 'pastor's wife' then NO...I'll never be ready. BUT, if you're asking me if I'm ready to stand beside my husband, walk alongside fellow believers who are hurting, empathize with the lonely, walk out my own life without fear of man, show my weakness because its how others come to see the power of the gospel in my life, imperfectly yet intentionally seek to raise babies who grow to adults who love Jesus, and give my heart to those I serve as we walk imperfectly together, sin against one another, and worship at the foot of the cross...then my answer is YES!" </div>
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I'm not "ready" because I can perform. I'm not "ready" because I can say the right things or do the acceptable thing. I'm not "ready" because I've mastered the art of life in a fish bowl. </div>
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I'm only "ready" when I can recognize my brokenness and take it to Jesus. I'm only "ready" when I see that out of my deepest pain can come my greatest joy. I'm only "ready" when I'm walking with Holy Spirit toward the freedom and healing He is leading me toward...surrendered to Him. </div>
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You may not be called to a man who is in ministry. You may be called to be a mother. To be a friend. To be a writer. To be a teacher. To be a nurse. To be a loving neighbor. To be a barista. To be an encouragement to someone. To be a light of the gospel in your workplace. Whatever it is you are called to, you aren't ready. You aren't capable. But if you're a Jesus follower, you know the one who is. His power lives in you. Rest there. Rest in your inability and His ability. When you know you can't you are in exactly the right place for seeing Holy Spirit take over and move in ways you've never dreamed. </div>
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Ladies of the church, may we not buy into the "boot straps, believe in yourself and you can conquer anything" mentality of the world...but may we embrace the truth that we are broken, weak, and in desperate need of Jesus daily. </div>
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Let's stop standing on the stage of performance </div>
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Let's lay at the foot of the cross...</div>
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because only then will we have power...</div>
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only then will we be "ready" for what God has called us to. </div>
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<i>*This post was birthed after listening to The God Centered Mom Podcast with Lara Casey. The quote was hers and it settled deep in my heart and caused all of these thoughts to spill out. I want to be sure to give credit where it is due, so please take a moment to listen to this episode if you resonate with these thoughts." </i></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-70298697992547091342016-12-12T09:09:00.001-05:002016-12-12T09:13:19.380-05:00He Who Breaks the Silence<div style="text-align: center;">
Psalm 40 is not typically what you think of when you think of Scripture that references Christmas or the Advent season. But God placed these verses in my path last week and they have ministered so much grace to my soul! </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0cYbt7VpbV6-r4iBqgQHe5ggSWtbooaC8pjlrIvfCHbtQ-RRCd4bzm-r4SNzDDdSTyNlWIrXh-lM4lSqEEhTTd5NjFTPTZQD5-xa27RN3hyphenhyphenQae8cVpGOTQZz1Nkr5QQ5FMxfIwVP-aZs/s1600/IMG_2574.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0cYbt7VpbV6-r4iBqgQHe5ggSWtbooaC8pjlrIvfCHbtQ-RRCd4bzm-r4SNzDDdSTyNlWIrXh-lM4lSqEEhTTd5NjFTPTZQD5-xa27RN3hyphenhyphenQae8cVpGOTQZz1Nkr5QQ5FMxfIwVP-aZs/s320/IMG_2574.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Advent--the arrival of a notable person, thing or event.</div>
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The beginning of the Christian church calendar year, advent is the season (including four Sundays) leading up to the day we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ--Christmas. </div>
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In my mind Advent is a season of waiting. Waiting on the arrival of a very notable person--Jesus. </div>
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While he has already come, taking time out each year to wait for the celebration of his birth is important. The anticipation. The inward longing. </div>
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As a child I waited to open gifts. That was the "notable event"! </div>
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As an adult, I'm seeing more and more the joy in simply savoring Jesus--THE Gift. </div>
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This Advent season has held highs and lows, ups and downs. Many are the moments I have longed to just hear Holy Spirit or see Him move in situations that I cannot control. I have prayed and begged to see Him. To hear Him. To deeply feel and know His love. This has been a very different Advent season. It hasn't held the same things that the last several years have held. We have experienced a lot of physical sickness and much soul grief. Yet there is joy. There is joy in the promise that Jesus is coming. Joy in knowing that He goes before us and makes our steps secure. Joy in believing that He alone is our rock. </div>
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<i>"I waited patiently for the Lord..."</i></div>
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I can't guarantee that I have or am waiting patiently! That's the hard part! </div>
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<i>"He set my feet upon a rock making my steps secure"</i></div>
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How many times this season I have thought about the Jewish people. The ones who didn't hear God for 400 years. The ones who wondered where He was! The ones who longed to hear His voice or see His good works. </div>
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And there my heart resonates...and is convicted. </div>
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I feel that longing that I'm certain the Israelites felt. The thing is, they felt it for MUCH longer! 400 years is an immensely long season of waiting. The last few months have felt like an eternity for me, but I simply cannot imagine 400 years. No wonder hearts grew faint in the waiting for the Christ. No wonder there were doubters. I understand in a deeper way the doubts and fears in the waiting for the Rescuer! </div>
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From this side of the manger, it should be easier to wait well. We have seen the life of Christ through the account of the Gospels and we have Holy Spirit with us continually. The Jewish people had neither of those things to rest on. But they clung to promises...promises like Psalm 40. They clung to stories of God's provision, protection, and faithfulness as told to them by their grandparents....great grandparents. </div>
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Yet we are still humans with tendencies to doubt what we cannot see. Waiting requires great faith. Great trust in what we cannot fully see at the moment. </div>
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All He asks is for us to wait on Him and He will do the rest. </div>
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May we each experience the groaning and agony of the silent waiting season because only then can we experience the full joy of arrival of Jesus--the seeing, the hearing, the knowing...the end of the waiting. </div>
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Our Rescuer has come. </div>
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He breaks the silence.</div>
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He shines light in darkness.</div>
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He redeems. </div>
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He fights.</div>
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He directs.</div>
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He protects.</div>
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He defends. </div>
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He has won the war against humanity. </div>
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The waiting may seem dark and silent...but the hope is that the Light is coming for you and for me. </div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-15725713179750680482016-11-08T16:11:00.002-05:002016-11-08T16:16:46.312-05:00A single red leaf<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Walking up the sidewalk to our house this morning was like any other morning after pre-school drop off. Typically I don't pay much attention to anything around me except for what is next on the list. Today was different. </div>
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Right in front of our porch steps something caught my eye. A beautiful red leaf. With it being Fall and November and all, this is to be expected. Leaves are all over our yard and our sidewalk and my porch steps. I sweep them and step on them almost daily. But most of the leaves are brown and yellow, not a vibrant red like this one. </div>
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It stood out. </div>
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It was different.</div>
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It was beautiful.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnC7j9YF96os80raePeVbwjvGZUHeqTXOkPZhJt31xxrnI08pNjwDZogkbxZsR4uOi3AmnFWOg93NBFw1MuP7wmXVwJ0gOiQsJrS5EWJOMhBGK6h9o65yCzdi9guwJrTkOYTbrl7bg-34/s1600/IMG_2346.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnC7j9YF96os80raePeVbwjvGZUHeqTXOkPZhJt31xxrnI08pNjwDZogkbxZsR4uOi3AmnFWOg93NBFw1MuP7wmXVwJ0gOiQsJrS5EWJOMhBGK6h9o65yCzdi9guwJrTkOYTbrl7bg-34/s320/IMG_2346.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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As I walked past, I noticed it and it became a passing thought. I unlocked the door with a baby in my arms who was ready for a nap and heard a still, small voice say, </div>
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"Go take a picture of the leaf". </div>
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Weird, right? </div>
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I almost didn't do it. </div>
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Thankfully, I'm learning to do even the weird things that still, small voice is telling me to do. </div>
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I captured a picture on my phone and went on to put the baby down for her morning nap. </div>
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Driving through town later in the day thoughts started pouring through my mind regarding that single red leaf surrounded by leaves that all look different from it but similar to one another. </div>
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Isn't it eye-catchingly beautiful when we see that single red leaf amidst a slew of yellow and brown ones? Sure, the yellow and brown are beautiful on their own but that spark of red just does something for the human eye and mind. </div>
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God gently told my soul (as I was microwaving my coffee at 3:30pm...hello, mom life) that if I saw that single red leaf as beautiful in its diversity, then why do I try so hard to look like the others around me? </div>
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Girls! It hit me so hard! We, as women...as women of the church, we strive so hard to have the same gifts, the same calling, the same jeans, the same loves, the same "picture-perfect" family as everyone around us...and that is <b>so boring!</b></div>
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There have been seasons of my life when I felt like the only things I was allowed to be "gifted" in was cooking food (a service for others) or babysitting kids (nursery at church or offering services to another mom "in need"). <b>Neither of those give me life. Neither of those things make me come alive! </b>They drain me. But that's what everyone else's gifting looked like. That's what others told me "I should" be doing. So, I did. </div>
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No longer. </div>
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There is so much beauty in being that single red leaf. </div>
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In pursuing the gifts God graced me with. Graced you with! </div>
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If we all pursue the same things. If we all look the same. Like the leaves in my yard we become dead and unnoticeable. But, if we are a spark of life like that single red leaf...if we use the gifts that bring us life then how much more can we bring life to others...how much more can the work of Holy Spirit be noticed in our lives! </div>
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<i>"Now there are <b>varieties of gifts, </b><u>but the same Spirit; </u>and there are <b>varieties of service</b> <u>but the same Lord;</u> and there are </i><i><b>varieties of activities, </b><u>but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone.</u> To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good."</i></div>
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1 Corinthians 12:4-7</div>
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Varieties of gifts, services, and activities. But all given for the common good (the sake of building the church! and sharing the gospel to an unredeemed world!) by the same Spirit! </div>
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We so often look around and feel as if we are not enough. Everyone is better. We should be doing what "so-and-so" is doing because it gets her affirmation and applause and isn't that what <b>we all want?</b> </div>
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Here's a new perspective--</div>
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God is already applauding you.</div>
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He is already affirming you. </div>
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So go with him.</div>
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Don't follow man's applause and be those boring yellow leaves that are abundant simply because everyone wants to be the yellow leaf that's getting applause from men. </div>
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Follow Holy Spirit.</div>
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Follow the life giver...the gift giver. </div>
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Be that single red leaf in a swirl of yellow ones.</div>
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Be the woman living her calling, pursuing her gifts, and serving others the way God calls you to for the sake of His kingdom. </div>
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Don't despise your gifts and strive for those you don't have. </div>
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Lean into your giftedness and seek God's face as to how He wants you to use it in whatever season you are in. If you ask Him and earnestly listen, He will tell you. And when He does, run after it with everything you have. </div>
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Our time on earth is too short to be a yellow leaf.</div>
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Our calling from Scripture is to use the variety of gifts God has given us </div>
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NOT to long for the ones we don't have. </div>
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God needs each of us women.</div>
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God needs each of our daughters.</div>
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He needs our daughters to see us using our gifts rather than despising them and speaking life into their gifts (even the ones we don't understand...or maybe even ones we don't like). </div>
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Be that spark of life.</div>
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That eye-catchingly beautiful single red leaf. </div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-46670673968175111582016-11-05T22:16:00.001-04:002016-11-06T02:22:54.346-05:00Seeing God on the Road (Part 1)<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;"><i>“Life is not always perfect. Like a road, it has many bends, ups and down, but that’s its beauty.” </i></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">--Amit Ray</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNlup7rNJ6cq7wdtLlWRzngrOwVmzkNcxNkehieez27ZNpn7hp4SQpO0hRxuX1wmzCdUoz6AqBiJX7yT8lIKxFfdjpv3XR7P-xE8iMfie5qq4F_CiPg5hhJqAfB4E53ZhGi0pLCAn4hA0/s1600/IMG_2273.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNlup7rNJ6cq7wdtLlWRzngrOwVmzkNcxNkehieez27ZNpn7hp4SQpO0hRxuX1wmzCdUoz6AqBiJX7yT8lIKxFfdjpv3XR7P-xE8iMfie5qq4F_CiPg5hhJqAfB4E53ZhGi0pLCAn4hA0/s320/IMG_2273.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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I'm sure many of you are curious about the details of our journey over the last year. In my previous post, I made mention of it being difficult year--full of ups and down--and while I'd never want to walk that road again, I'm thankful we have because it has brought us to where we are now. </div>
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Seeing God lead down a path we couldn't fully see was hard but beautiful, and I want to give you a glimpse of how He led us. We are broken people asking God to use us...He shines through our brokenness which is what I hope you see so that you will not say, "Look at the Ervins!" but so you will say "Look at how great our God is!" </div>
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There are so many details that I cannot include them all, but I'll hit the highlights and give you the best glimpse of God in our story that I can. </div>
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In early 2016 it became apparent that we were not going to be able to church plant in the way we had been envisioning. So we began to pray and just ask God to lead us wherever he wanted us--we didn't know if that would even be church planting/revitalizing and we were open to whatever He had for us. </div>
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On June 10 we were just finished up rehearsal for my sister's wedding when my mom "happened" upon a gentleman and his two grandsons walking down the street in front of the wedding venue. In her typical fashion, my mom struck up conversation and came to find out that one of the boys was around the same age as G-man. She encouraged him to find G and play with him. </div>
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I was sitting on the porch and up came a little boy who asked me if I had seen G. Though I didn't know him, I figured it was okay to point him in G's direction...Michael had taken him to our cottage for a few minutes. I glanced over a few moments later and found Michael talking to the grandfather of the boy (typical of him to strike up conversation with anyone in his path). I honestly thought nothing of it until later that night when Michael informed me that the grandfather was a local pastor. As they continued talking Michael found out that he had a vision to train young men and send them out to revitalize or plant churches in the Appalachian region. Seriously?!? A "chance" meeting that led to that discussion. We were both shocked.</div>
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The next day Michael ran into him again and they talked briefly but made plans to have lunch soon. </div>
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That lunch meeting proved to be pivotal. As they met and Michael listened it was as if this man shared the same vision...as if he had been inside Michael's head and heart. He was speaking words Michael and I had spoken in our own private conversations regarding church planting. The thing that totally struck us was when he mentioned that he could really see our family planting a church in a town like Clarksburg/Bridgeport, WV. Maybe not significant to just anyone, but that was the first town we had really looked at when we first began dreaming of church planting several years prior. We had loved the area and just could never get away from it. For him to say that he could see us in that exact town was another confirmation that we needed to follow Holy Spirit's leading and continue walking this road. Michael made plans to preach at his church the following month to just see how God would lead. </div>
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The day came for us to load up the car with our three littles and drive the hour commute for Michael to preach. It was a horrible morning. The spiritual warfare was evident in each of our hearts. The closer we got to the church the worse it got. Our children were acting out, throwing tantrums in the car. Maybe that doesn't sound like a spiritual battle to you, but in my life my enemy knows how to get to me and its usually through my children causing chaos. That pushes my buttons like nothing else. Michael prayed over our family while we were in the car and once we arrived at the exit we pulled off to pray again and talk with the kids. Praying had an enormous effect on the chaos and brought peace to the entire situation. We were well received by the people at this small, Appalachian church. Lunch afterwards with the pastor and his family proved to be another confirmation. </div>
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The discussion over lunch was simple. Nothing earth shattering to the casual on-looker, but without having to bring up the topics and questions we had already discussed, the pastor brought up each one of our concerns and thoughts. He even spoke to wounds in my heart that had developed over the past year...he spoke truth to them.</div>
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He asked us to take two weeks to pray about whether this was God's leading. We agreed.</div>
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We got in the car to leave and looked at one another. </div>
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We both knew we didn't need two weeks. </div>
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This was God's leading. </div>
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<b>To be continued...</b></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-58665968129930607132016-10-04T13:37:00.000-04:002016-10-04T13:37:24.112-04:00Around the curve<br />
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You know when you're driving a curvy road and you can't see what's around the next turn? You can see the turn, but nothing beyond that? </div>
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That is the best way to describe our life for the last year. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWFYRWYnWYn51XxkqrZbZ9vnnbFFC0ip77ajUJ-6d_lTeJLlMyF-EHL54tjm2PXZZdXLXIrYa-huOrK2pIxcrp6tMTV3g1Z5u33f_cNTd8ykKlgxXw7jVk-x_EgyMk8ng2IxTFTXCZYIg/s1600/road-curve-bend-ray-of-sunshine.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWFYRWYnWYn51XxkqrZbZ9vnnbFFC0ip77ajUJ-6d_lTeJLlMyF-EHL54tjm2PXZZdXLXIrYa-huOrK2pIxcrp6tMTV3g1Z5u33f_cNTd8ykKlgxXw7jVk-x_EgyMk8ng2IxTFTXCZYIg/s320/road-curve-bend-ray-of-sunshine.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Last September we said "No" to a very good opportunity to come alongside a church and help them grow/replant. If you've been around here anytime at all, you know that is our dream. Our calling. </div>
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Saying no was hard. But the events that followed were even harder. </div>
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Without going into too much detail, we faced a critique from leaders in our lives that was difficult to hear. After praying through their thoughts and recommendations as well as seeking counsel from mentors and people who know us well, we recognized that we disagreed with them. God was telling us to continue our pursuit of church planting/re-planting despite recommendations to do the opposite. It was extremely difficult to go against those in our lives whom we love, but we also knew that we could not forsake God's calling in exchange for man's wisdom. </div>
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Throughout the process we were questioned. Our maturity was questioned. Our calling was questioned. Our gifts and skill sets were questioned. The health of our marriage was questioned. Our friendships were compromised. </div>
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But through everything, one thing remained the same...</div>
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Our faithful Father. </div>
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He continued to lead us around that curve. </div>
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We could see<b> nothing in front</b> of us. Those in our immediate line of sight were telling us to <b>turn around</b>. But God kept pressing us<b> forward</b>. </div>
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Throughout this process Holy Spirit has continually brought me to meditate on Exodus 14:14 </div>
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<b>"<i>The Lord will fight for you</i></b></div>
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<i><b>You need only to be silent."</b></i></div>
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How hard that has been! To keep<b> silent </b>when I want to <b>defend</b>. But, how <b>beautiful</b> it has been to see Him defend us. When others try to defame by going to friends and trying to spin our story in a different light, He has stepped in and stopped it. He has been fighting battles that we were not aware were waging until after the fact. Which causes my heart to rejoice and affirm that we are indeed <b>not fighting against flesh and blood</b>. That truth allows me to forgive the humans that have hurt us, because I know that they are not the real enemy. The real enemy is Satan, and he will use whoever he can to wound us. He will cause division and cause man to war against man so that the gospel is hindered. I refuse to allow that. My only enemy is Satan. I heard someone a few months ago say, "What Satan can separate He can dominate". Truth. This is all taking a little rabbit trail, but sisters let's join together against the real enemy and stop warring against our brothers and sisters in Christ. </div>
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All of that to say, we have made our way around that big, long, hard turn in the road. Where there was fog we now have clarity. God has lead us to join with the Southern Baptist Convention in West Virginia to plant/re-plant a church in our region within the next year. Currently we are working with another SBC church doing an "internship" and hope to launch into a new work within a year. It has all been such a crazy process. Feelings of excitement, pain, loneliness, anticipation, and rest have accompanied us on our journey. We are beyond excited to see what God has for us as we pursue this dream that he has placed in us. This calling that He has lead us in. There are tons of things to still figure out, but we know that He will continue this work that he started and all of our questions (How? Where? When?) will be answered in time as we follow Him. </div>
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We're around the curve and moving forward, onward, and upward. </div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-47638934445265353892016-08-16T21:19:00.000-04:002016-08-16T21:35:34.461-04:00Evie's Birth Story<div style="text-align: center;">
I want to introduce you all to the newest member of the Ervin clan...</div>
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Miss Evie G </div>
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She's now three months old so the introduction is a little late, but I couldn't let another moment go by without officially documenting her arrival here in this little space! You know, based on other posts, that I adore birth stories...but my own babies' birth stories are always my favorite. They have each been so different and Miss Evie did not disappoint! </div>
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Actually, it started a little earlier than planned. Back in March Evie (or my body...not sure which) decided that 31 weeks we a good time to deliver a baby which landed us in the hospital for about a week while they stopped labor (twice) and made sure we were okay to head home. Then after that, things went perfectly and she stayed growing inside of me for another 7 weeks. It was definitely a scary experience, and maybe one day I'll write it out here for you, but let's keep the focus of this post on her actual arrival. </div>
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Many of you read <a href="http://firstpeter310.blogspot.com/2013/07/a-dramatic-entrance.html">G-man's birth story</a> of how we barely made it to the hospital before he was born. I was worried this time that we wouldn't make it. We actually prayed that God would allow us to make it before it became another stressful situation, and while I really wanted another birth center birth (like <a href="http://firstpeter310.blogspot.com/2011/03/eliyahs-birth-story.html">E's birth</a>) I wasn't so set on it that I would risk birthing a baby in the car on the 30 minute drive there. So we were totally open to a hospital birth this time around. </div>
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Friday evening, May 6, we went to Chick Fil A for dinner to celebrate a cousin's birthday. I was grumpy (ask Hubs or my mom...they'll tell you). I simply wasn't in the mood to be around screaming kids (two of them my own) and trying to coerce them to sit and eat chicken nuggets while they desperately just wanted to play in the play area. Braxton-Hicks contractions had become a norm for me with this pregnancy. Every. Evening. They weren't painful, but I could feel the tightening of my belly and it was simply not comfortable. All of that combined with being "done" with pregnancy and hormones...made for a perfect storm for a grumpy momma. </div>
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After dinner my mom took the kids for a little while so Hubs and I had a quiet ride home where we talked about how we were SO ready to meet this little girl. Kids came home and went to bed while I sat on the porch with my mom and her roommate and just relaxed. Mom commented on how hard my belly looked...and she was right! Those Braxton-Hicks were still coming and going. It was totally normal. As I went in to go to bed, I didn't think much of my continuing BH contractions because honestly every night when I went to bed I had them. But then I woke up to go to the bathroom around midnight and was still feeling them. I woke Michael up and told him that it wasn't normal for me to continue to feel them, but I did not want to be one of those women who went to the hospital in "false labor"...but I didn't want another almost-unattended-unplanned-homebirth! We decided to call the midwife on call. She knew my story and basically told me to come get checked. She'd rather send me home than me birth a baby at home alone. I agreed! </div>
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We got to the hospital (a couple miles down the road) around 1:00am on Saturday. They knew I was coming so they were ready for me and she checked my cervix. She had checked me on Wednesday at my office visit and I was 3cm 80% effaced. At this point, I was 4cm and 90% effaced so she decided to monitor me for an hour or two to see what happened. Some friends who were out late (and who knew what was happening) brought Michael much needed coffee. Both of us had only slept about an hour. Around 3:00am I was dilated to 5cm, so they admitted me. We were definitely having a baby. </div>
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Our doula came once they admitted me and around 6:00am I was at 7cm. Progressing pretty quickly but really feeling no pain. I know. Its crazy. You hate me. But seriously. I was shocked too. With E I felt serious intense pain during transition so I was ready to have it hit me at 8cm. It had been so easy up until that point and thinking of the pain coming made me sick to my stomach! I was scared and unsure I could do it...again. At 8cm I still only felt mild cramp like contractions. Not painful but definitely could feel the muscles tense up. The nurses were astounded that I was still walking the halls at 8cm! But, despite the walking I stalled at 8cm. Maybe my body was tired but I wanted to birth this girl before the midwives switched shifts. So she broke my water and we kept walking and doing other squats and such to get baby girl in the best position. </div>
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Let's be honest...my doula and Hubs were bored to tears. Hubs actually fell asleep multiple times because we were just sitting around waiting basically. There wasn't much for the doula to do because I wasn't in as much pain as I expected and I didn't really need any "support" at the time. It made the time really drag by.</div>
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Several hours later I was still at 8cm. The midwife I really wanted to deliver had left and the new one started talking Pitocin. I had heard horrible things about it so I declined at first. Finally after another hour at 8cm I decided I would do it. I honestly expected the worst. Really hard contractions that were unbearable (after going to 8cm with hardly feeling much at all). I braced myself...but it never came. The contractions picked up, yes, but they were only slightly more intense. Definitely still tolerable. within an hour or two I was at 10cm and fully effaced. Ready to push! </div>
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That's when the pain hit. </div>
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And it hit hard. </div>
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Hubs said I pushed for 12 minutes but it felt like an eternity.</div>
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Then she was born. </div>
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My beautiful Evangeline. </div>
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All 6 pounds and 2 ounces of her.</div>
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I cried and just keep saying "she's beautiful". </div>
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I don't know if it was the pre-term labor and all that stress around her possibly being born too early and what that would mean for her/us or what it was. She is the only baby I have delivered and cried upon seeing. It was precious. </div>
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It was the day before Mother's Day...and adding another little one to our family was the perfect way to celebrate! </div>
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Looking back to G-man's birth...I think it was similar. I was in active labor but didn't feel anything until it was time to push and I was still at home. Thankfully this time around, God gave me that gut instinct to go ahead and go get checked because even though I wasn't in pain I knew something was different with (what I thought were) the BH contractions. </div>
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**These lovely newborn photos were taken by our friend <a href="http://annaprudenphotography.com/">Anna</a>**</div>
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*Our amazing and patient doula and hospital photographer was our friend <a href="https://www.facebook.com/andreareedydoula/?fref=ts">Andrea</a>*</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-31310486922325616012016-02-04T07:00:00.000-05:002016-02-04T07:00:02.367-05:00A Frugal Valentine<div style="text-align: center;">
Alright...I understand that the word "frugal" doesn't typically equal "romantic". But stick with me hear! If you are like me, you want to celebrate Valentine's day with your spouse (or significant other) but maybe your budget is a little tight. How do you swing a decent Valentine celebration with little extra cash when things like a simple bouquet of flowers go up in price significantly for that day alone? </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Valentine Mantle decor from our little apartment 4 years ago.<br /><br /><span style="font-size: small;">The last few Valentine's days we have skipping the fancy restaurants and expensive meals, flowers, and gifts and opted for something a little simpler. </span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: small;">Qdoba. </span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: small;">Yes. We ate at a fast food restaurant on Valentine's day. But there was good reason! </span><br /><span style="font-size: small;">Qdoba has a special promotion on Valentine's day--</span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: large;">If you kiss at the register you get a buy one get one free meal!<br /></span><img class="image__src" src="http://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/scalefit_630_noupscale/56a2a5022a00002c00031209.jpeg" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #444444; font-family: NotoNashkArabic, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Roboto, Arial, sans-serif; height: auto; max-width: 100%;" /></td></tr>
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So we have basically gotten our meals on Valentine's day the last few years for half price! How great is that? Granted...it isn't the most romantic location, or the most exquisite food. But its a date that isn't expensive. </div>
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It looks like Qdoba is offering this promotion again this Valentine's day! If you have a local Qdoba you should look into whether or not they are going to have this promotion going on. </div>
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We typically follow up our dinner with a movie, dessert, or wandering the mall with coffee for a little while. I prefer something where we can talk because with two small children at home, talking uninterruptedly is a rarity! </div>
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I'd love to hear how you celebrate a more frugal Valentine's day. </div>
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You can leave your ideas in the comments! </div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-31465941871255780662016-02-03T06:52:00.002-05:002016-02-03T06:52:42.534-05:00February Currently <div style="text-align: center;">
February is now in full swing! The ground hog didn't see his shadow, so we are hoping for an early Spring! Today I'm linking up with <a href="http://www.goldandbloom.com/blog/">Gold and Bloom</a> to share my February "Currently"! This is always a fun post to think through, write and share with you! This month I'm sharing what I am <b>-sending-eating-dreaming-smelling-hearting. </b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2FWBMbkRtJ_4TQQVVu6NQoWVKxRLLXkQNqW6zkavEUTxYTbYJTrXUDWuxdN6B5R33zFCGTnSagR_r-b0BBPGRrU01GpHjD0m4uUgL2dwcvtYRsltKVPsAN-6_NhlgdJmMDeURauubY08/s1600/blogger-image--2039970917.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2FWBMbkRtJ_4TQQVVu6NQoWVKxRLLXkQNqW6zkavEUTxYTbYJTrXUDWuxdN6B5R33zFCGTnSagR_r-b0BBPGRrU01GpHjD0m4uUgL2dwcvtYRsltKVPsAN-6_NhlgdJmMDeURauubY08/s200/blogger-image--2039970917.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtaSG28VaL6eHpJvOHp0nxSdU61NeZWlr9-24IkILor_6OGoV9oHZ0pkIlokzG6nl0Jar1gg1D5pfXScATDeD4HG-i8X2M6ndS-qjfdc5KC5hecL4R7-LF05-ABWvESnQ733Oq3EVrIdo/s1600/blogger-image--1884144735.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtaSG28VaL6eHpJvOHp0nxSdU61NeZWlr9-24IkILor_6OGoV9oHZ0pkIlokzG6nl0Jar1gg1D5pfXScATDeD4HG-i8X2M6ndS-qjfdc5KC5hecL4R7-LF05-ABWvESnQ733Oq3EVrIdo/s200/blogger-image--1884144735.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<b>sending... </b>emojis. it seems like almost every time I send a text message I am tempted to put a little smiling emoji in it. I've been trying not to do it too often because...is that annoying for there to be a smiley with every text? yes. I think so. </div>
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<b>eating... </b>less sugary treats. more fruit. blueberries in particular are my favorite right now although they are a bit more expensive than in summer months. I splurge a little every few weeks and pick up a pint for myself. </div>
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<b>dreaming... </b>about Spring. This winter has been nice--warmer with one major snow. Just how I like it. Now we can move on to warmer weather and sunshine (and baby's due date)!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9SI3cw3DbquBlE8he7Yc-I_B4hMwyrYlph4q1oiKOjpjmCF74gai6qvuXAGVz3dAn2NyAw5KdMkXsjXvX_mVralH8G2NBUkQUX0_pCHDJQKm_ogBU7v_1I6e4WoH0_QmA6JRSMgNcZ70/s1600/blogger-image-1654432928.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9SI3cw3DbquBlE8he7Yc-I_B4hMwyrYlph4q1oiKOjpjmCF74gai6qvuXAGVz3dAn2NyAw5KdMkXsjXvX_mVralH8G2NBUkQUX0_pCHDJQKm_ogBU7v_1I6e4WoH0_QmA6JRSMgNcZ70/s200/blogger-image-1654432928.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<b>smelling... </b>my morning coffee. candles (I've been lighting more around the house lately in attempt to bring a little cheer to the dreariness of winter). fretting falling rain.</div>
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<b>hearting... </b>Sally Clarkson's new book <i>The Life Giving Home </i>that I got on my doorstep yesterday. Spotify playlist Hymns for Hipsters (check it out). </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiD697UZrh0PRXYPmSI0XOeqTtjEwn4cNy5pDBPjpq7GdDjKEnf5H0CewKeFmojEVP1xgx7XB8sQscaC6nyuZgpxyxsDJ2Kax86SpM2-PLQpY-7OMiV4XvELMc_AtKLHOMInxKymhoOJfQ/s1600/blogger-image--1931542272.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiD697UZrh0PRXYPmSI0XOeqTtjEwn4cNy5pDBPjpq7GdDjKEnf5H0CewKeFmojEVP1xgx7XB8sQscaC6nyuZgpxyxsDJ2Kax86SpM2-PLQpY-7OMiV4XvELMc_AtKLHOMInxKymhoOJfQ/s200/blogger-image--1931542272.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>
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I pray you are enjoying this first week of February and looking forward to what God has in store for you and your family this month! Don't forget...its LEAP YEAR! </div>
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Happy February!</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-30275881710758421252016-02-01T14:31:00.001-05:002016-02-01T14:31:13.583-05:00What I Learned in January<div style="text-align: center;">
How is January over already? Does anyone feel like the ball just dropped and the confetti has barely been cleaned up? Yep. That's me. But amazingly enough, it is over and we are all moving on into February!<br /><br /><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwgvna3b0nAuk9NtfFjQB-MhP0kPmdQX-22eS3C1zrEEdFDSpOi1MHLfKtw0rUEuNRkYwPn0zjapPaA9t2ZhHM4habDX3yLhzHkB2vgHMuoKcPPwiq-dmccnUr_fHy8xNzIEnskTOVog8/s1600/blogger-image--185837902.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwgvna3b0nAuk9NtfFjQB-MhP0kPmdQX-22eS3C1zrEEdFDSpOi1MHLfKtw0rUEuNRkYwPn0zjapPaA9t2ZhHM4habDX3yLhzHkB2vgHMuoKcPPwiq-dmccnUr_fHy8xNzIEnskTOVog8/s320/blogger-image--185837902.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One of my favorite pictures of my littles. He wanted to dance with<br />his big sister. </td></tr>
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Before I move on, I like to take time to reflect on what I have learned over the last month. Not that I can really take any credit for. It is God who has been graciously opening my eyes, showing me areas where I need to grow and blind spots I didn't know I had. </div>
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1. <b>REST has been so good.</b> You'll recall that "REST" is my word for 2016 and to be honest, I didn't know how desperately I needed rest until I took some time for it. I'm not talking about sleeping all the time or being lazy (although I have given myself more grace to nap during this season) but simply creating some white space in my schedule. I've said no to things that would drain me or leave me depleted with only leftovers to give my family. I have said yes to things that fill me up and allow me to have more to give my family. I have taken more lavender baths in the last month than in the year. We have majorly slowed down as a family. We aren't running all over town on errands or just for fun. We are staying home more in the evenings and simply being together. It has been so good. My soul is so much more full. I have actually enjoyed cooking dinner on more than one occasion (typically its a rush and I don't look forward to it at all). The snow storm last week really pushed us into rest because we were snowed in for 2 days. It was glorious. Yes...by the end we all had some cabin fever, but overall we just loved a slower pace. </div>
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Only one month in and rest has filled my soul more than I could have realized. I cannot imagine what the year will be like if I am able to keep rest in my sights and continue on this path of creating space.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOzEKCqKdwryNkz7rnHRO2xnFuwmNxfa69I-s7Fe5UhaXsg_q-BeEOvKuVXxeecq52umliR6nQQf6v2bT0O-wCG70utq3ha-aA0bbyY7c1uJJCnMwYsaF3MDT4LuG6hzS8j7L20RRistE/s1600/blogger-image--472993628.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOzEKCqKdwryNkz7rnHRO2xnFuwmNxfa69I-s7Fe5UhaXsg_q-BeEOvKuVXxeecq52umliR6nQQf6v2bT0O-wCG70utq3ha-aA0bbyY7c1uJJCnMwYsaF3MDT4LuG6hzS8j7L20RRistE/s200/blogger-image--472993628.jpg" width="200" /></a><br />
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2. <b>Our baby now has a title. </b>We debated for a while over whether or not to find out the gender of baby #3. With #1 we waited until birth to find out and it was so much fun! With #2 some friends threw us a gender reveal party just a couple months before the birth and finding out with our family and friends was also extremely fun! So with #3 we were torn. But, we decided to do something different. We found out and then we revealed to our family and friends in differing ways at different times. I'm pretty sure some of them probably still don't know. We didn't want a big announcement on social media (just yet). We have taken our time telling everyone in unique little ways. We mailed most of our family and some friends a "scratch off" ticket. Some friends found out a little early because we were staying with them while our furnace was being replaced on the day we found out--so we colored some sparkling grape juice and poured it as a celebration. </div>
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Are you curious yet? </div>
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Baby #3 (who will arrive in May) has the title of....</div>
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<i>little sister. </i></div>
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My E-girl has been praying for a little sister, so we are all excited, but she is ecstatic! </div>
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3. <b>Slow mornings are my favorite.</b> I just really enjoy a good, slow morning. Savoring the coffee in my cup, reading, journaling, NOT having to get up and get out the door early. Just relaxing and enjoying. Most days that doesn't happen. Most days are pretty full...getting E to pre-school, heading to doctor's appointments, making sure the pantry is stocked and picking up other household essentials. But those days when I sleep past my alarm, soak up the morning sun streaming through the windows, slowly sip the coffee from my mug and maybe even make pancakes for my family (rather than cereal or oatmeal), those are mornings that make me feel at peace. Those are the mornings I look forward to! </div>
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4. <b>There are several new dinner options that my family really enjoys! </b>In the last month, I have found a couple new recipes that my family really seems to enjoy. This makes me happy. It is so easy to get into a rut when it comes to meal planning and I am always happy to find a new recipe (or two) that my family will eat and enjoy! One of them is Italian Chicken and Quinoa Soup. It is extremely easy and is made in the crock pot! My kids aren't huge soup fans, but when given a sandwich or something to dip in it, they love it. San Fransisco Style Pork Chops served with mashed potatoes and green beans--HIT! Like, out-of-the-park-home-run-HIT! Hubs really loves it and the kids gobble it up! A friend made them for us and I got the recipe from her. I have made the recipe at least 2-3 times since she gave it to me because I haven't met a person who doesn't like it! </div>
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5. <b>Creating beautiful spaces bring me joy.</b> I think I have known this for a while, but I am realizing its depth. I have wrestled with finding what God has created me to do, doing it, and serving others with it. While I sometimes enjoy cooking, cooking is not life-giving to me. Yes. I will serve others with food when that is necessary, but it doesn't get my heart beating rapidly. Caring for children (whether nursery at church, babysitting for friends, etc) is not life-giving to me. But both of those things are BIG ways women typically serve within a church context. That a music--I love music as well but in this season I don't have the time to invest in my piano playing to be able to do it well and truly serve others with it. So I wrestled with how God wired me. How did he create me to serve the body? What makes me come alive when I'm doing it? And how can I use it to serve others?<br />
Since reading The Nester's book, I have seen just how much creating beautiful, peaceful spaces in my home has given life to me as well as my family and friends who come to spend time here. But I never saw it as ministry...until today. Yes. Today.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ78Hn-GYTX4uywyReijVCmk3aCu7qldWL_caMCbRynsvzZx2MFRKpWG1x7eb6SGGCbQvbK45JY-OsN9RMQf29DCT3xGIO8FfQTvLmwN99XsED4Iqg-775PyL9lcnGr7qS8iwqXYr6xcY/s1600/blogger-image-1724417489.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ78Hn-GYTX4uywyReijVCmk3aCu7qldWL_caMCbRynsvzZx2MFRKpWG1x7eb6SGGCbQvbK45JY-OsN9RMQf29DCT3xGIO8FfQTvLmwN99XsED4Iqg-775PyL9lcnGr7qS8iwqXYr6xcY/s200/blogger-image-1724417489.jpg" width="200" /></a><br />
I am hosting an IF:Local gathering this weekend at our church. Its the third year we have done one, but we are actually decorating and trying to create a place of comfort and peace that allows the women coming to feel comfortable and safe....kind of like sitting in a friend's living room with a warm cup of coffee. So I have been dreaming and scheming decorating ideas for a little more than a week. Today I shopped my house and gathered some of my favorite things to decorate with. We are keeping decorating simple--candles, twinkle lights, lanterns, items from nature--but beautiful. While I was gathering my candles and lanterns and dreaming of where they would go in the welcome center of the church, it hit me...this is what I am made to do. AND I am loving and serving others by doing it! God has given me a way to use my creativity to bring beauty, joy, comfort to other ladies this weekend. When I finally saw it as a service and not just a hobby, it filled my soul! Now, I don't know what using this gift for the church looks like outside of this weekend, but I know I am supposed to because God created that love for creating beauty within me. </div>
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6. <b>A cup of coffee might just make me cry. </b>I'm going to be really honest here for a minute (**note--if you don't like raw honesty you can skip this last one**). Mondays are usually hard for me, but today was beyond hard. Before we had even had lunch the day felt heavier than I could bare. Too many things going on "behind the scenes" and trials that my family is walking through. I know so much of it is a spiritual battle leading up to IF:Local this weekend. There's not a doubt in my mind that my soul's enemy is trying to shake me, distract me, and discourage me this week as I seek to gather women, pray, worship, and have our hearts challenged and freed by the work of Jesus. I felt overwhelmed. I cried half the morning (maybe some pregnancy hormones at work here too). Then I got a text from one of my "IF girls" (that's how I refer to the girls who have been with me in the IF:gathering vision since the first one) sent a text<br />
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<i>"my shirt (along with a goodie) is on your porch. Purple table..."</i><br />
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I was expecting her to drop off a shirt for this weekend and I think my mind totally dismissed the "along with a goodie" part because when I opened the door I was only expected a bag with her shirt in it. Instead, there was also a little snack and cup of coffee. Yep. I definitely cried. Who knew something so simple would be so meaningful on a day like today! God knew. He prompted her. She listened. And I am so thankful. Friends like these girls are one of God's greatest answers to prayer in my life. I prayed for heart knit together like this...knowing one another deeply...walking through life with one another in the mundane little things not just the exciting or hard big things. This was one of those mundane little things in life that God used to show me he has heard my prayers for women like this in my life. He has answered. He is gracious.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbmYt5mIfk8vnCQ-gglYuqENxH9Pre51zz3nbjW-c9uwpspx8CiZPGQVl0s6fb3VFssFSl2GFf2hXxxAjOw44iAYsoZN_tOOawrYSYsDUTg2JV8ZmkRv6WrLvEOdNv27jO69WPafmpr3o/s1600/blogger-image--1747586657.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbmYt5mIfk8vnCQ-gglYuqENxH9Pre51zz3nbjW-c9uwpspx8CiZPGQVl0s6fb3VFssFSl2GFf2hXxxAjOw44iAYsoZN_tOOawrYSYsDUTg2JV8ZmkRv6WrLvEOdNv27jO69WPafmpr3o/s200/blogger-image--1747586657.jpg" width="150" /></a><br />
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I'm sure there are many more things I have learned over the last month. And I pray I continue learning lessons in my life both big and small. I hope God never stops showing me my need and his grace.<br />
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<i>Check out all the other "What I learned" posts over at <a href="http://www.emilypfreeman.com/blog">Chatting at the Sk</a>y</i></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-75450208209952435692016-01-28T09:38:00.000-05:002016-01-28T09:39:52.483-05:00Sharing Stories, Hope & Encouragement<div style="text-align: center;">
I hope you're ready to use your imagination with me a little this morning!<br />
Ready? Alright!<br />
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Put yourself in these circumstances...<br />
You're a young woman<br />
who just gave birth to her first born (a daughter) 3 months ago.<br />
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That's a nice thought, right?<br />
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Right as your daughter turns 3 months old you are diagnosed with cancer<br />
You're given 15 months to live with typical treatment<br />
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OR<br />
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There is a more risky treatment available that could extend your life a few years but it is just that...risky and expensive.<br />
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What would you do?<br />
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If you're like me, you'd probably cry, get angry, cry more, hold your baby extra tightly, snuggle up with your husband who is also scared and hurting. You'd weigh your options and begin to worry about everything that goes with each option (side effects, risks, finances, etc).<br />
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This is not just a scenario to be played out in our minds, but this is the real-life story of Heath Von St. James. Just three months after her daughter was born, she was diagnosed with mesothelioma-- a form of lung cancer caused (most often) by asbestos exposure. When Heather was a little girl, she would wear her father's work jacket around when he returned home each evening not knowing that the asbestos particles she was inhaling would eventually lead to cancer...a very aggressive form of cancer.<br />
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Like all of us, Heather and her husband were scared, but they faced this entire ordeal with courage and determination. Upon hearing the 15 month prognosis and the other more risky option, they immediately decided to go for the second option. Wouldn't you? What mother can imagine dying before her baby is 2 years old? It was really their only hope. But what mother can imagine having her lung totally removed? That's scary, but not too scary when it comes to saving your life.<br />
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In the face of having this intensive procedure, Heather's sister coined the phrase "Lung Leavin' Day" to help make the scary day seem a little less scary. Heather's family gathered to write their fears on plates and smash them into a fire as a symbolic way of letting their fears go.<br />
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On February 2, 2006 Heather Von St. James had the procedure done to remove the cancerous lung.<br />
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Now, 10 years later she is still celebrating with her family! She is a survivor of what looked like a very hopeless diagnosis. She has seen her daughter grow, spent more time with her husband and family, and grown courageous in more ways than one. She is now sharing her story to raise awareness for mesothelioma research and treatment.<br />
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This February 2 will mark 10 years since the original "Lung Leavin' Day". Heather and her family will gather again to celebrate, write out their fears, and burn them. Ten years is a remarkable milestone when the original prognosis was 15 months! Heather's story has encouraged many others facing a battle for their lives. Take some time to read a little more about Heather's journey and learn about mesothelioma caused by asbestos.<br />
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You can check out more of <a href="http://www.mesothelioma.com/heather/survivor/#part-2">Heather's story here</a> </div>
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or <a href="http://www.mesothelioma.com/heather/lungleavinday/#.VqZ3gIT41ca">Lung Leavin' Day here</a>!<br />
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Then consider your story. It might not seem quite as "heroic" or "courageous" but just like Heather, you have a story. A story that could encourage someone. A story that could give hope. A story that God is writing for you. It may seem simple. Your life may have been relatively easy...or maybe it was extraordinarily hard. Whatever your story, God wants to use it to bring hope to others.<br />
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2 Corinthians 1:3-5 says<br />
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all or affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too."<br />
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Each one of our stories has hard elements as well as exciting, fun, and beautiful chapters. God wants to work through each of our stories to share His love, grace, comfort and freedom with those around us. So, what's your story?<br />
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Be courageous. Share.<br />
It just might encourage someone. </div>
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<a href="http://s1184.photobucket.com/albums/z331/mrservin1/?action=view&current=signature.png" target="_blank"><img alt="Photobucket" border="0" src="http://i1184.photobucket.com/albums/z331/mrservin1/signature.png" /></a>
<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-471083443785717542016-01-11T15:00:00.000-05:002016-01-11T15:00:09.553-05:00One Little Word<div style="text-align: center;">
I might be a little bit behind on the "one little word" trend. Typically I spend an afternoon with Hubs planning goals for the year, but this year that just didn't happen. I kept stressing over it in my head, but with sickness over Christmas and other things to keep up with we just never got a chance to get away and go to a quiet spot to think, reflect, and plan. </div>
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So I decided that this year I would keep things a little simpler.</div>
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Instead of creating a laundry list of goals that our family would like to see accomplished, I would choose one word for myself to set a precedent for the year. </div>
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As I began praying about it the word that God kept showing me was "rest". </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD8ltUf5r64wLEMEuD0mIAoGKUKWdYwAl42YtBquVD1Sp5925OGo9c_STLjX63iwc7fuX64TMBDH29xWfeCDnq8C9flgC9go83Oxw2dDbHjzYsUFxvlCYfwWCK44Fd_QEo0voKvpCMk4o/s640/blogger-image-1170994599.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD8ltUf5r64wLEMEuD0mIAoGKUKWdYwAl42YtBquVD1Sp5925OGo9c_STLjX63iwc7fuX64TMBDH29xWfeCDnq8C9flgC9go83Oxw2dDbHjzYsUFxvlCYfwWCK44Fd_QEo0voKvpCMk4o/s320/blogger-image-1170994599.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I tried (believe me I tried) to find a different word. A popular blogger had already chosen that word and I didn't want to seem like I was mimicking her. Also, rest is hard. That's a hard word to define your year. I think it is hard for me because I am such a do-er. I find a lot of my identity in what I am able to get done or how productive I am able to be. </div>
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But God would not stop putting that word before me each morning. It was the only word that sounded right. The only one I could think of. </div>
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So I surrendered to it and finally wrote it out in my journal. </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">2016 will be a year of rest. </span></div>
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Now, I'm not sure what that looks like. </div>
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But I know it doesn't just mean physical rest. It means spiritual rest as well. </div>
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Resting in God and his sovereignty when I don't understand what is going on. And let me tell you...I have had to put that into practice so much earlier in the year than I anticipated! The ball had hardly dropped in Times Square before life started spinning out of control. </div>
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I am trying to make time for physical rest as well...and being pregnant that is so helpful! My energy has been lacking this entire pregnancy and since I have given myself permission to rest each day, I don't feel as guilty for that afternoon nap. </div>
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"Rest" also means saying "no" to things I might otherwise have said "yes" to. </div>
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Jen Hatmaker really helped me with this post she put on Instagram a week or so ago:</div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><a class="_4zhc5 _iqaka" data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.0" href="https://www.instagram.com/jenhatmaker/" style="border: 0px; color: #125688; font-family: proxima-nova, 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-weight: 600; line-height: 18px; margin: 0px 0.3em 0px 0px; overflow: hidden; padding: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-overflow: ellipsis; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: nowrap;" title="jenhatmaker">jenhatmaker</a><span data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1" style="border: 0px; font-family: proxima-nova, 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; vertical-align: baseline;"><span data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.0" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">As you move into 2016 hoping for a saner schedule that prioritizes your actual life and keeps you focused on the things that matter the most, let me share the decision-making filter my agent Curtis always gives me: "If it's not a HELL YES, then it's a no." So that medium yes, that I-feel-like-should yes, that guilty yes, that coerced yes, that I-actually-hate-this-thing yes, that I-guess-so yes, that who-else-will-do-it yes, that careless yes, that default yes, that resentful yes, that I-probably-shouldn't-but-struggle-with-boundaries yes? </span><br data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.$newline1/=10" /><span data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.2" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">NO. Nope. </span><br data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.$newline3/=10" /><span data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.4" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">No thank you. I am unable to commit to that this year. Thank you so much for asking, but any new yes I give right now means a no to my family and sanity. I am so flattered you asked and count on my prayers, but I am at my maximum bandwidth right now. I appreciate your work so much, but I've already committed my time and energy this year. I've loved being a part of this, but I am no longer able to continue. We are aggressively focused on x, y, and z this year, so as a family we've agreed on no new commitments. This is what I can give but won't be able to do more right now. </span><br data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.$newline5/=10" /><span data-reactid=".1.1.0.0.2.1.0.0.1.6" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Now, the things that make your heart race, your blood pump, the fire in your belly burn, your gifts to leap to life, and keep your family and home healthy and strong...the hell yeses? ALL IN, BABY.</span></span></span></div>
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So when people I love have put opportunities before me to serve that take my energy from my family and that don't make my gifts leap to life...I've said "no". Not always what I want to say because I want to serve, I want to be helpful, I want to love well. But saying "no" isn't unloving.</div>
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Holly Gerth puts it this way in her book <i>You're Loved No Matter What" </i></div>
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"Real friends love your 'no' as much as they love your 'yes'. Mary and Martha received a 'no' when they wanted Jesus to come right away.But that 'no' led to the resurrection of Lazarus--a miracle beyond what they could have imagined when they first asked Jesus to come. I wonder if Mary, Martha, Lazarus, and Jesus embraced and wept again when they were reunited. But this time the tears would not have been from sorrow. Instead they would be the kind we shed <b>when we see how God can transform even a painful 'no' into a glorious 'YES".</b></blockquote>
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Her words have deeply encouraged me and strengthened my "no" because it is a purposeful "no". </div>
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"Rest" will be a struggle for this productivity seeker this year. But it will be a good struggle. A sanctifying struggle that I pray teaches me more about myself and my God and allows me to focus on the things that really bring life to my soul rather than all the things I feel like I should be doing that actually drain me. </div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-41286415889503278482016-01-08T07:31:00.000-05:002016-01-08T15:13:27.861-05:00January Currently<div style="text-align: center;">
happy 2016! </div>
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I figured I'd begin this new year off with a January currently post. </div>
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I'm linking up with <a href="http://www.goldandbloom.com/2016/01/currently-january/">Goldandbloovm</a> for this fun post to talk about what is currently happening in my life in 5 simple areas! </div>
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Here we go! </div>
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<b>{resolving}</b> this year I decided to choose one little word (more about that coming next week). I took several weeks and prayed through what that word should be. If its a word that is going to define and influence my entire year, I want it to be meaningful and be life giving to me and those around me. The word I felt God continually pointing me to this year is "REST". Both physical and spiritual rest....resting physically from the hurriedness of life and simply resting in Christ for the direction, strength, and grace I need each day. And like I said...come back next week for a more detailed post all about this year of "REST"</div>
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<b>{reading} </b>right now I am reading <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Fit-Burst-Abundance-Mayhem-Motherhood/dp/1591281288"><i>Fit to Burst</i> </a> by Rachel Jankovic. I purchased it on kindle a while back and finally (after the move) found my kindle and charged it up. I love the short but meaningful chapters in this book! If you're a momma of littles, its a recommended read for sure! I am also trying to complete Modern Mrs. Darcy's 2016 Reading Challenge this year. 12 books in one year. I think I can do it...I think!</div>
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<b>{organizing} </b>everything! we moved so close to the holidays and I was so wiped out by this pregnancy that nothing got done well or in an organized manner. Now I'm spending a lot of time getting this put where I want them and figuring out what works well for our new space. Its a lot of work! </div>
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<b>{loving}</b> podcasts. If you know me in real life at all, you know that I talk about things I hear on podcasts all the time. Maybe its the stage of life I am in--surrounded by littles all day--but I really enjoy <strike>eavesdropping</strike> listening in on other people's conversations. A few that I absolutely adore and listen to each week are: </div>
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*The God Centered Mom PodCast</div>
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*MudStories Podcast</div>
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*SortaAwesome Podcast</div>
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*Inspired to Action Podcast (but she hasn't had a new episode in a while). </div>
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<b>{craving}</b> this should be easy since I'm pregnant, right? Well...sometimes I crave things and other times I don't, but with this pregnancy its been all. the. carbs. (if it is a sweet carb...cookie, muffin, etc...even better). and also ice cold water. I guess I get more easily dehydrated when pregnant than I typically would so I seem to be wanting cold water and/or ice all the time. </div>
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That's what I'm currently up to in real life! </div>
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Of course there's more, but its so fun to focus on a few specific areas and delve into things I rarely think about. I hardly ever stop to think about what I'm really loving. This is a good practice to keep up (preaching to myself here)! </div>
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Head on over to Goldandbloom to see what others around the blog-o-sphere are currently up to!</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png"></a><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-21095277223626518862015-11-06T08:55:00.003-05:002015-11-06T08:55:46.084-05:00November Currently<div style="text-align: center;">
I did a similar style post back in September when I was doing the blogging challenge. And it was so much fun I thought I'd do it again! </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoU6zT419Uu1IURJvKJI6vkojL_OqE5kZnYtKuIetdDeqRgD6tN63IZj-Rf80fXp3D28XZIoeOw85GMY56gaIeGuj2uEvYC3q-kNKabwIBcbMN5Oy64D62edWP6Nf5lrUihyphenhyphenxQEH-SEI8/s1600/2015-11-06.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoU6zT419Uu1IURJvKJI6vkojL_OqE5kZnYtKuIetdDeqRgD6tN63IZj-Rf80fXp3D28XZIoeOw85GMY56gaIeGuj2uEvYC3q-kNKabwIBcbMN5Oy64D62edWP6Nf5lrUihyphenhyphenxQEH-SEI8/s400/2015-11-06.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>cooking:</b> eggs. toast. seemly lots of breakfast items. since we moved I haven't really done much cooking. I have reheated plenty of left overs and scrambled eggs just seem really easy to make. maybe once the kitchen is more in order I will feel up to cooking again...</div>
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<b>planning: </b>how to organize our new place. I really do love our new place but trying to figure out where things should go is a little overwhelming at times. along with all of that, I'm trying to plan for the upcoming holidays...</div>
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<b>smelling: </b>my fall scented candles. I love Harvest from Yankee Candle and recently purchased vanilla sandalwood from ePantry. they bring the cozy smells of fall into our home and with all the chaos of moving, those smells bring comfort and a little bit of sanity to my life.</div>
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<b>appreciating: </b>the people God put in our lives who have been so helpful the last couple of weeks. we have had many people babysit the littles so we can pack or sort or whatever needs done. many guys came out to help with the actual move and several ladies helped me clean both our new place and the old one. others have brought us food so we don't have to cook. so many people have pitched in to bless and encourage us in this difficult process.</div>
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<b>anticipating: </b>the upcoming holidays! let's not skip straight to Christmas. I love Thanksgiving as well...spending time with family, eating delicious food, making memories! I'm really looking forward to decorating for Christmas in our new place. I've even tried to envision where I want the tree...and where I will sit to enjoy it's warm twinkling lights. </div>
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what are you doing currently?</div>
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join us <a href="http://www.anneinresidence.com/2015/11/currently.html">over here</a> for a link up!</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-36658225620623172392015-10-30T08:30:00.001-04:002015-10-30T08:30:47.584-04:006 Things I learned in October<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT060AvpsD7yWcgn6cnalHgEJ4sAv0eBdlL6jRKqezrsgNhZsS4Ykpom9BgPuSDRkr1LxkMuS_jt27DsQeTBgjPGwqjm65d0wPkujgHYUsA1oCV0Tw8nv1h84s8pltVnfX-YGGI5xhthE/s1600/2015-10-30.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT060AvpsD7yWcgn6cnalHgEJ4sAv0eBdlL6jRKqezrsgNhZsS4Ykpom9BgPuSDRkr1LxkMuS_jt27DsQeTBgjPGwqjm65d0wPkujgHYUsA1oCV0Tw8nv1h84s8pltVnfX-YGGI5xhthE/s400/2015-10-30.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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It is really hard for me to comprehend that October is basically over. Wow. </div>
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I love Fall and this October has not disappointed! </div>
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I'm linking up with <a href="http://emilypfreeman.com/blog">Emily P. Freeman</a> today to discuss some things I have learned as I reflect back over this month before moving on to the lovely month of November. </div>
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<b>1. We are moving. </b></div>
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Yes. You read that correctly. Not a big move. Just down the street basically. To a more permanent type of place. </div>
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In just under 8 years of marriage this will be our 7th move. All. The. Craziness. </div>
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The packing has been horrific this time and as I type this my dining room table is covered with random junk that doesn't really have a home but needs packed, my bedroom is full of clean laundry that I can't decide whether to fold or just throw in a box and move it, and my kitchen is half packed and half full of dirty dishes. This is by far the most difficult move we have made...because I am moving with 2 littles. Last time we moved we only had E BUT it was 10 days before Gman's due date...so that included its own level of stress. </div>
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<b>2. Speaking of due dates, we are adding another little to our family...</b></div>
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...in May. </div>
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We "learned" about this waaayyyy before October, but we finally started telling our families and making the news public last week. </div>
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Baby #3 will be here in mid-May...right about a month before I'm supposed to be Matron-of-Honor in my little sister's wedding...perfect timing ;) </div>
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<b>3. <i>The Good Wife</i> is my new guilty pleasure</b></div>
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I don't really feel all that guilty about it actually. Hubs and I watched Parenthood together over the course of a couple months. When it was over we were sad...I was probably more sad than he was. It took a while to find something that we <i>both </i>enjoy watching. Thanks to <a href="http://sortaawesomemegan.tumblr.com/">Megan Tietz and the Sorta Awesome podcast</a> I heard about <i>The Good Wife</i>. </div>
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The pilot episode hooked me. </div>
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How many shows can you say that about? </div>
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I mean, even Downton Abbey took me more than one episode to get caught up in the show. </div>
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Not this one. </div>
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There is an underlying story line that carries from episode to episode but there are quicker story lines that finish out in just one episode. Best of both worlds. I think that's what keeps me hooked...that and the fact that Alicia is just so amazing. </div>
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<b>4. My girl likes chai lattes</b></div>
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And she stole mine.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTx0KzDjM61RfgwQHTG01ZkeS4BfTU2-zcdx5ycXepd_ugOTjeus2vyxv1r893tAIKKBuPpZLQLNJxfy2OXyW6fgUCXe3m6hy6oDBb5_rp8u_-XwUYNo8bl5hpEpKwIX1u2TX6fb7q7FU/s1600/IMG_0465.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTx0KzDjM61RfgwQHTG01ZkeS4BfTU2-zcdx5ycXepd_ugOTjeus2vyxv1r893tAIKKBuPpZLQLNJxfy2OXyW6fgUCXe3m6hy6oDBb5_rp8u_-XwUYNo8bl5hpEpKwIX1u2TX6fb7q7FU/s200/IMG_0465.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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Don't ask me why she is wearing mittens. She is her own person...I'll leave it at that.</div>
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She decided she really likes chai lattes now. So much for Momma having a little treat for herself. </div>
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<b>5. Making soup really is beautiful</b></div>
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and grounding. </div>
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Emily P. Freeman mentioned this in her book<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Simply-Tuesday-Small-Moment-Living-Fast-Moving/dp/0800722450"> <i>Simply Tuesday</i></a>. I found it to be true as I made vegetable soup one chilly Saturday afternoon. Chopping the veggies, letting them simmer, browning the meat. All very simple, yet very grounding. Like this was the work I was made to do. It made me feel at rest rather than rushed. </div>
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Thanks, Emily for your thoughts on soup making. It helped me to pause as I was making my own and recognize the beauty in that simple task. </div>
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<b>6. My littles make everything an adventure</b></div>
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I'm almost certain I already knew this, but they proved it again a couple of weeks ago. Replica ships of the Nina and the Pinta (Columbus' ships) were docked in our city for a couple of days. Since E had learned about them in preschool that week we decided to go see them. </div>
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They thought the ships looked like pirate ships so they were convinced they would see Zarina (pirate fairy) and Captain Hook. E dressed as Zarina to go on the ship (see photo at top of this post). Complete with a cape and tiara. She also brought along her bunny Lilly Rose. Gman kept asking where Captain Hook was. </div>
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Those littles of mine really had fun that afternoon. We finished the evening out with my favorite gluten-free pizza in town! </div>
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There are so many other things I could think that I learned this month, but these are the highlights. </div>
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So thankful for even the hard weeks God took my family through in the last month or so. It hasn't been all smiles, but we have learned a lot about who we are and who He is. </div>
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Looking forward to November...and getting ready for the Holiday season! I know some people dread it and in some scenarios I do too (like the busy-ness of it all) but there is such an excitement around that time. And traditions. I absolutely LOVE traditions! Maybe that's another post in itself. ;) </div>
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I hope you enjoy your last couple of October days!</div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8906444307988257042.post-57488688840852696472015-10-17T14:43:00.001-04:002015-10-17T14:43:45.074-04:00When the answer is "No"'<br />
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I remember being a child and hearing my parents answer "No" to some of my requests. I had the same rebuttal in my head (and sometimes out loud) that most children do-- </div>
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<i>Then you don't love me.</i></div>
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As a parent I now realize how untrue and frustrating that is! </div>
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As an adult, I still struggle with those thoughts. But not toward my parents. </div>
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The last couple months have been difficult for our family. Mainly Hubs and me. If you've been around this little space of the web very long you know our desire for church planting/revitalization ministry. You also know how we have been pursuing that for years while trying to live patiently and contentedly in the waiting. </div>
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About a month ago I would have told you that it was happening. We were on the brink. We even looked at houses for sale in a new area of our state! And we found was that was beyond perfect...complete with every <i>want</i> we have when it comes to a house (built-in book cases, hardwood floors, loads of natural light). While I wasn't totally convinced, I was becoming more excited for the possibility. Everything was falling into place.</div>
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With one email response, it was over. </div>
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It was unexpected. </div>
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It wasn't foreseen.</div>
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There was nothing anyone did to cause it to go wrong. </div>
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God just said "No". </div>
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And this wasn't the first time. </div>
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About a year ago, the same thing happened. </div>
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<i>Why?</i> </div>
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was my first thought. </div>
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<i>Now what?</i></div>
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came second. </div>
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<i>More waiting? </i></div>
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<i>Really, God? </i></div>
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<i>This was not what we had planned.</i></div>
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Everything changed. </div>
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The days that followed held hard words from those we love. Words that weren't meant to, but brought discouragement. They brought doubt. They brought fear along with loads of tears (mainly mine). They brought confusion. </div>
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We were under a spiritual attack unlike anything we had ever experienced. Holy Spirit was moving all around us, but so was the enemy. I simply cannot explain the heaviness and hope all at once. I can't put words around the sense of spiritual oppression we felt in those weeks. </div>
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I kept waiting for something big to happen. </div>
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Nothing really did. </div>
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Except that God has spoken so much truth to our hearts over the last few weeks that he would have never been able to speak if we had not been desperate to hear from him. </div>
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One of the voices he used for me was of a new author, long-time blogger Amber C. Haines. </div>
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I heard her on a podcast and then a friend let me borrow her new book</div>
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<i>Wild in the Hollow</i></div>
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I cannot recommend it enough. </div>
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Just today, I finished it. </div>
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I wept through the last chapter as her words cut my heart and I knew Holy Spirit was using her words to bring healing to my soul. </div>
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God has said "No" to so many of my hopes and dreams and things that seem so right and so good. </div>
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The last few weeks have seemed full of "No"s from him.</div>
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My thoughts return to that of a child (because aren't we all still children when we come to Him?). </div>
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<i>Then you don't love me.</i></div>
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Amber's words in the last paragraph of her book struck my heart right in that place where I believe he doesn't love me if he doesn't give me what I want or think I need. </div>
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<i><span style="font-size: large;">"How he must love me to have said no to so many other things to bring me here."</span></i></div>
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He had brought me here. And he is taking me other places. I can't see it all yet and I won't see it all clearly...ever. </div>
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But I can know this. </div>
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His "No" does not mean he doesn't love me. </div>
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His "No" means he knows me. </div>
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His "No" means he knows best.</div>
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His "No" means he loves me so much that he is bringing me to the place where I am most satisfied in Him...not in my circumstances. Not in my dreams or desires. But in Him. </div>
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He knows what will satisfy me.</div>
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He knows what I need. </div>
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It is Him. </div>
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His "No" really means</div>
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<i>I love you.</i></div>
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<a data-pin-config="above" data-pin-do="buttonPin" href="https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.flickr.com%2Fphotos%2Fkentbrew%2F6851755809%2F&media=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm8.staticflickr.com%2F7027%2F6851755809_df5b2051c9_z.jpg&description=Next%20stop%3A%20Pinterest"><img src="//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05501760563097966959noreply@blogger.com1